My girlfriend and I had sex twice last week. I felt tired afterwards both times. How can I feel more active and energetic after sex rather than like I want to fall asleep?
There are many hormonal changes that occur during sexual excitement and particularly at the point of orgasm.
Although both males and females release some similar hormones at the time of orgasm, for reasons that are not entirely clear, men seem to be more likely to feel particularly tired (and even to fall asleep) within minutes of having sex and ejaculating.
This is a pretty common experience that many men and women have.
As I know of no research-backed way to cause alertness after sex rather than a sense of feeling tired, you might stick to sex at night or on weekends when you’re not in a rush to get to class or work or otherwise need a lot of energy.
If you’re feeling more than just plain tired, or if this is a change for you (and you used to not feel so tired after sex), you might mention this to your healthcare provider.
Although not well understood, some doctors and scientists have begun to look at what is called “post-orgasmic illness syndrome,” a name for the experience some people have of feeling extreme fatigue, anxiety, irritability and/or having headaches after sex.
There is a limited amount of research on this and many other reasons people may have these same symptoms after sex, which is why it would be helpful to mention to a healthcare provider.
Kinsey Confidential is a collaboration of The Kinsey Institute and the IU School of Public Health. Dr. Debby Herbenick is an associate professor at Indiana University and author of six books about sex including “The Coregasm Workout” and “Sex Made Easy.” Find our blog and archived Q&A at KinseyConfidential.org. Follow Dr. Herbenick on Twitter @DebbyHerbenick and Kinsey Confidential at @KinseyCon.
