Two strikes: you're out

Having trouble waiting out the Olympics for the beginning of the fall TV season? Just wait until next year. Wish all entertainment could be real like "Survivor" and "Big Brother"? Well, you just might get your wish.\nAccording to a recent report from Entertainment Weekly, the Writers Guild of America plans to go on strike May 2, 2001. What that means is that next May every writer of film and television screenplays will cease working on current projects and refuse to market anything new.\nStill unconvinced about this affecting you? Well, less than two months later, every single member of the Screen Actors Guild and the American Federation of Television and Radio Artists could follow. This means that not only will there be no scripts for new episodes of "Friends," but that Jennifer Aniston, Matthew Perry and even Bob the extra who sits at the coffee shop each week will all walk out and refuse to work. \nAs we speak, actors are in the middle of a strike against advertisers, meaning that no member of either union will shoot any type of commercial or promotion (in other words, the reason Life cereal brought back that Mikey commercial.)\nAs the strike dates approach, WGA executive director Vance Van Petten and SAG president William Daniels (Mr. Feeny from "Boy Meets World") tell Entertainment Weekly that talks are at a standstill.\nMoney is, of course, the source of all these problems. Advertisers, studios, actors and writers are fighting over how to split revenues from cable, video, foreign sales and the Internet. While this actually sounds like a bunch of greedy actors who want money on top of their $20 million paychecks, it's not quite that simple. The stars that make the cover of People each week (or at least the weeks when Prince William didn't do anything) make up only a very small fraction of working actors. And even the Aaron Sorkins of the writing world don't make nearly as much as a celebrity. So don't say that (most of) these people don't need that extra money.\nIf the strikes happen, say goodbye to entertainment as we know it. Unlike a strike of steel workers or airline pilots, becoming a scab actor means never being admitted into a union and not working when the strike ends. A strike means no new fictional fall TV for 2001 and no new movies after studios run out of films already finished. Reality TV, such as newsmagazines, or "Survivor 8: The Final Rat Dinner," or reruns will be networks' only options. \nMovie theaters may also turn to re-releases. The only place to find new material made in America will be the stage (Actors Equity, the stage actors union, is not affected by the problems of the others because most plays and musicals are performed live, and a tape of a play from the United States isn\'t typically released in Costa Rica or Japan.)\nTaking a look at the black, white and fire engine red cover of the Entertainment Weekly strike issue causes two conflicting opinions. One can be scared of the shutdowns and angry with both parties involved for letting this go too far. Or you can laugh at poor Entertainment Weekly for jumping the gun and reporting on something that is little more than a slight possibility. Which of these viewpoints is best to take will only become apparent next spring. \nEither we'll all be laughing as we watch the new season of "Friends" or scrounging up money to go Broadway in order to avoid all those reruns.