Differing, ignorant polls no longer just for politics

I know this is a soccer column, but one cannot ignore that it's that time of year again. That's right, it's election time. The fun is almost over, but you still have five more days to cherish those negative ads, idiotic talk-show appearances, third-party whinefests and polls. \nAnd more polls. \nAnd more polls after that.\nWhich brings me to the magical link between politics and collegiate soccer -- polls. \nNow I don't want to get off on a rant here, but this season the members of the four polls seem to have the combined intelligence of Darryl Strawberry's two remaining brain cells, which, from what I hear, are still hopped up on Xanax.\nWhile it seems like a distant memory, I seem to recall that my first column of the season commented on how IU may have unfairly, or lazily, been placed at the top spot in the National Soccer Coaches Association of America (NSCAA) preseason poll. When that column was drafted I had only one poll to speculate about. But thanks to other media outlets that believe they have the sage-like wisdom to rank the best teams in the land, this poll-bashing column will bear much more depth.\nImagine Pat Buchanan thinking he was walking into a Reform Party Rally in Bloomington and instead walking into Eroticon. Now you have a slight idea of the level of confusion these voters are dealing with.\nThe four polls -- the NSCAA, SoccerTimes.com, Soccer America and College Soccer Online Media (CSO) -- collectively have bigger discrepancies than Al Gore's campaign finance records. But enough ranting I suppose, here's a few examples to back it up.\nFour polls, four No. 1 teams in the country. Granted, no team has really stepped up and dominated college soccer this season, but there must be two folks in agreement, right? Wrong. SoccerTimes.com has North Carolina on top, while Soccer America has Southern Methodist number one. The Hoosiers wear the target in the CSO poll, while San Jose St. is the big cheese in the NSCAA poll.\nAnd speaking of San Jose St., let's take a closer look. The Spartans are the nation's only undefeated team at 14-0-1. While they haven't played the toughest schedule in the nation (by far), they deserve a little credit, right? Apparently not, as they are ranked No. 3, No. 6 and No. 13. Anything in the 6-10 range is laughable, but No. 13? That's disrespectful and downright idiotic (shame on you, CSO).\nMore than a few other schools have some major differences between the pollsters. Clemson is ranked No. 8 by Soccer America, but No. 19 by the NSCAA. Duke is No. 9 in Soccer America, while the NSCAA has them all the way back at No. 24. South Carolina, after cooling off in recent weeks, has dropped to No. 22 in the NSCAA poll, but remains 8th in the CSO rankings. One of IU's losses this season came to the hands of the Creighton Blue Jays, who are No. 7 in the CSO, but No. 21 in the SoccerTimes.com poll. \nAnd then there's Portland, who has mystified pollsters and fans alike all season. The Pilots, who have dropped their last three games, remain in the middle of the road in the Soccer America and CSO polls, at No. 14 and No. 11 respectively. Portland dropped out of the other two polls in this week.\nAnd while this next tidbit is somewhat ridiculous, I must admit that I did find some joy in it. Penn State, after losing three games in a week (Akron, IU and South Carolina) fell off the Soccer America poll after being ranked third the week before. God bless this country!\nSo what can be done about this wasteland known as college soccer rankings? Well, I say scrap them completely, for a few reasons.\n1. Way too many politics are involved, from both the coaches and the media members.\n2. Voters put too much emphasis on teams in their own region (ACC-land, I'm talking to you!)\n3. Voters must be going on results alone, as there is little to no coverage of collegiate soccer on television. As many soccer fans know, sometimes a team might look better in a 2-1 loss than a 1-0 win.\nSo, once the polls close after the season, maybe something can be done to modify the system of out-of-control collegiate soccer polls, although it's highly unlikely. But in the meantime, it is kind of fun to say, "We're Number 1 ... and 3, and 4 and 5"