Former Miss Arizona speaks on perfectionism, eating disorders

What could possess a woman who has won beauty pageants her whole life to despise her body and demean her own self image?\nTuesday night in Woodburn Hall, Stacey Kole, Miss Arizona 1998 and sixth-place contestant in the 1998 Miss USA contest, spoke to an audience of about 60 people, primarily women, about her struggles with perfectionism and an eating disorder.\nKole began by discussing what goes on behind the scenes of the Miss USA pageant, revealing the many insecurities contestants have.\n"How ironic is it that some of the most beautiful girls in the world think so little of themselves?" Kole said.\nKole's story begins when she was diagnosed by a doctor as "a perfectionist developing an eating disorder" at age 16. Kole said she was viewed as the the "perfect daughter" and considered a role model by adults and teachers who knew her.\n"I felt sheer terror at the thought of having to get up for one more day and be perfect again," Kole said of the day after she was diagnosed with anorexia. "I tried to physically embody depression and void any feelings of worth."\nKole described an eating disorder as no different than an addiction to any drug. She said the two motivating factors for them are emotional vulnerability and the need for approval.\nIn closing, Kole quoted a Bible verse from which she said she gained the inspiration to help herself get better and spoke about how a close relationship with God helped her live a full, meaningful life. She told the audience that eating disorders are not about an empty stomach, but an empty heart, and closed by encouraging the audience to "live life to the full."\n"This speaker was relevant to women and almost everyone can relate to what she shared," said Sadee Conners, an employee of the sponsoring organization, Campus Crusade for Christ. "It impacted me the most because it showed that there is hope in the fullness of life that can be found not in appearance but in a relationship with God."\nDuring the speech, Kole quoted several statistics about eating disorders. She said eight to 10 million women have anorexia or bulimia, and one in five college women will have had an eating disorder in their lifetime. She said 92 percent of people with eating disorders surveyed said they would secretly welcome help if it were offered.\n Freshman Rita Nelson said, "She had a really powerful message, and it really impacted me personally."\n Several women in the audience agreed that Kole's message is relevant to their lives and feelings of insecurity about themselves.\n "I liked hearing about the pageants the most," said 1999 IU alumna Kellie Parker. "I think it's really touching how she shared heart and personal experiences too."\nAfter receiving a degree from Dallas Theological College, Kole became an advocate for eating disorder awareness and wrote "Satisfying the Starving Soul." Kole will speak again at 8 p.m. tonight in the Chemistry Building, Room 122, at the weekly Campus Crusade for Christ meeting.