A word for lost friends

On my darkest nights, I think there's a vengeful god, one who receives pleasure from prematurely removing the best and brightest, hell-bent on the destruction of this planet. From a curled lump on my couch, I scream at him through tear-filled eyes, asking what gives him the right to meddle with others' happiness.\nBut most evenings, I simply stare into the night sky, pondering loneliness and the wind's ability to detect mood. It picks up momentum just as the runaway train of my thought process comes crashing into the climactic decision that my loved ones are gone forever.\nIt's often noted that every dead person becomes a saint in the eyes of their mourners. That observation is true, only to the degree that we as a culture have been trained to respect the memories of fallen comrades. Certainly an admirable quality, moreso than the cannibalistic tendencies we show toward the living. But, for the sake of honesty, this is not the most fulfilling practice.\nWhen everyone becomes a hero in death, the greatness of the true heroes is diluted. When every gravestone is created by the same human hands, the uniqueness of each memory fades into oblivion. Soon the only place for the dead is in our hearts.\nAs generations pass, the only memories that remain are those immortalized within the context of history and ideas. The rich, the famous and the world-renowned become later generations' default stereotypes of their ancestors.\nBut, as nearly every person on the planet ironically understands, those people are rarely the ones who truly touch our lives. A piece of legislation, a contemporary novel or a corporate merger affect our daily existence less than our personal encounters, both beloved and chance. We remember the well-known because it's easy, but humans are still the biggest factor in the human condition.\nIt's hard to let the memories of these people slip away. Whether it be the 79-year-old whose sharp mind and warm heart finally succumbs to a long bout of cancer or the 23-year-old whose beautiful eyes and room-warming smile are dragged away painfully early, the human deserves to be remembered. But, after eternity locks its lips on you and I, who will tend to the fire of these peoples' memory?\nAs the glow fades, the embers burn and the wood slowly turns to ash, another memory of another unique and irreplaceable person is lost forever. For as many that have gone, that many more are yet to be lost. Time cannot be defeated. Luckily, beyond all the metaphors, past the rhetoric, there's still hope.\nFor while each human, at least at the level where he or she truly made a difference, will ultimately be forgotten, the spirit of that person will live forever.\nTake the time to remember your fallen family and friends -- if you've taken on the weight of carrying them with you, they certainly deserve it. The lessons they gave you and the love they showed is the reason you miss them. Make it the reason you remember them. In our lives, all we can ever be are teachers and students.\nFlowers wither and die, gold turns to dust and every one of us will eventually die. But some things can last forever.\nWho, what, when and where are concepts for dusty bookshelves. Why is the true reason we remember these people. Why is what we carry with us for the rest of our lives. Why is what we pass, either consciously or subconsciously, to those who will continue after we are gone.