Painting celebrates life of Behrman

Barbara Richards remembers distinctly the instant she learned of Jill Behrman's disappearance. \nIt was the middle of the night, and Richards, wife of School of Music dean Gwyn Richards, recalls being jarred by a radio report detailing the disappearance of a young bicyclist. \nShe remembers thinking how horrible it would be, how tragic, for a parent to face such uncertainty, such irreparable heartache. \nYet it was only when the announcer disclosed the victim's name -- a name now recognizable to virtually any Bloomington resident -- that Richards realized the gravity of the situation.\nThat name was Jill Behrman. Daughter of Eric and Marilyn Behrman, sister of Brian and member of Megan Richards's confirmation class at First United Methodist Church, Jill was many things to many people. To the Richards family, she was one of their "stair-step kids," part of the foursome comprising the Richards and Behrman families' flock. \n"I remember thinking, 'Oh no, not Jill--not our Jill,'" Richards said. \nA COMMUNITY'S SUPPORT\nYet Barbera Richards remembers more the events immediately surrounding May 31, 2000.\nShe reflects on the kindness and enthusiasm of a community, of a city she said "joined hands" to orchestrate search efforts.\nShe remembers the yards and yards of yellow ribbon used initially to link her house to the Behrman\'s, inches and feet of ribbon later used to symbolize Bloomington's commitment to bringing a young woman home. \nShe thinks of the balloon launch orchestrated by her daughter Megan, in which hundreds of balloons with Jill's flier attached were released into the Bloomington skies. \nRichards wanted to do more, however. When presented with an oil pastel painting created by croatian/canadian artist Rajka Kupesic, she was intrigued by the use of color and motion, by the Old World passion with which Kupesic created images. She simply had to meet her, she said.\nKupesic, whose son Boris attends the School of Music under Dean Richards, traveled to the States the following summer, in the midst of the search for Jill. Richards recalls sitting around the kitchen table with Kupesic and detailing the events surrounding Behrman's mysterious disappearance. \nThe story spoke to Kupesic as painter and parent alike, and suddenly Richards knew how she could contribute to what Eric Behrman terms a "celebration of her spirit."\n"I asked what the process would be to commission a painting," Richards said. "She told me, but she made sure to say she only painted happy scenes. That's when I knew I wanted to commission a work that would reflect the support of the community that loved her, not the community that took her away."\nThe result, completed in January 2001 and unveiled yesterday at a wine and cheese reception at the IU Foundation, is a celebration of the things and people comprising the Bloomington community. The Behrman's church stands in the background, accompanied by scenes of Farmer's Market and the Sample Gates, a symbol of the university. Families and children play in the foreground along with musicians and characters attired in academic garb. Throughout the painting fly yellow balloons, though Kupesic knew nothing of the balloon launch prior to completing the work.\nAnd in the center stands Jill with her bicycle, the only recognizable character in the image. She faces the viewer whereas the others turn slightly away, and she's smiling. She's a portrait of vigor, of a zest for life and enthusiasm for well-being. \nAnd to Richards, there are no accidents in life.\n"Reika was the right one," she said. "She made the melody of youth transcend our pain."\nPAYING HOMAGE\nShortly before spring break this year, Eric Behrman was called to meet IU Foundation director Curt Simic at the Foundation. He had no idea why.\nWhen he arrived at Showalter House, he was shown a copy of the commissioned work, and was, simply, "overwhelmed." He loved the use of color and the style with which the painting was created. \nMost of all, he loved the way Kupesic depicted his daughter, a woman he said loved working out and was dedicated to her job at the Student Recreational Sports Center--even if she was cleaning the floor mats. \n"Jill saw things she thought others should see," he said. "She was never afraid of hard work."\nShe proved that through her dedication to cycling. The summer before her freshman year, Jill rode from Bloomington to Atlantic City with local cycling group DeCycles, and she wanted to train for the Little 500 race her sophomore year. \n"When she rode, she wasn't just out there for a leisurely ride. She rode fast," Behrman said. \nAnd though he'll never truly achieve closure, he says he's seeking resolution, at least -- the knowledge that some answers are out there to the seemingly endless stream of questions he and his wife face. \n"Obviously, our big concern is finding her," he said. "But also as a parent, if these kinds of things go unresolved, it could happen again -- and I'd hate to see that."\nYet he, too, retains hope.\n"I'd like to see her walk through the door someday and say, "Hey, Dad,'" he says softly, dropping his eyes. "She was a fun-loving girl."\nProceeds from sales of the painting will be added to the growing Jill Behrman Emerging Leader Scholarship to be offered through the Division of Recreational Sports. \n"Jill loved sports, and she enjoyed giving her best," Behrman said. "This scholarship embodies that spirit."\nA MOTHER'S GRIEF\nDuring the opening reception preceding the painting's disclosure, Marilyn Behrman appeared composed. \nShe drifted through the standing room-only crowd smiling assuredly, stopping to greet an old friend here, a longtime colleague there. Everyone, it seemed, knew this mother of two and sympathized with her plight, a struggle she's endured for over a year now.\nYet when Marilyn Behrman assumed a position behind the podium to add her concluding remarks and offer thanks, her demeanor quieted noticeably. Voice rich in emotion, she admitted she must work every day to accept what may have happened to her daughter. She said she knows it's all right to be sad, yet she considers herself "blessed with support."\nShe encouraged the audience to take time to cultivate relationships, because somewhere, somehow, she's able to find hope in the past year's struggles. Since Jill's disappearance, she said, she's noticed changes in the ways people prioritize their lives, evidenced through gifts of love, kindness, concern and prayers offered by members of the Bloomington community and throughout the country. \nThe painting, she said, was an especially touching gesture.\n"It reminds us that there is innocence in youth, despite the uncertainties life brings us," Behrman claimed. "That richness in life brings hope."\nLooking steadily at the faces of friends, of coworkers, of devoted searchers, her voice clear and strong, Behrman thanked them with words combining at once the complex multitude of emotions only a mother in her situation might utter.\n"I am overwhelmed by your presence, but no longer surprised," she concluded. "Jill is a very special person, and I'll always hold her in my heart, if not in my arms"