Pop stars can't sing for Christmas

Some people have a rule about not busting out the Christmas music until after Thanksgiving. But MTV's TRL Christmas is one CD worth avoiding now and always. \nThrowing some jingle bells in the background does not mean it's Christmas music. And too many songs on this CD don't even talk about the holidays -- they're just a money-grubbing attempt to show off TRL stars.\nThe few recognizable songs are nothing special, sometimes even worse. Willa Ford's version of "Santa Baby" -- to which title she adds "Gimme Gimme Gimme" -- sounds too much like Ford's only hit, "I Wanna Be Bad," and is a desecration of the song such singers as Eartha Kitt and Madonna made famous. And there's nothing noteworthy about Bif Naked's "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" or Sugar Ray doing the Beach Boys' version of "Little Saint Nick." \nThere are actually a couple … um, different, but good songs. You can't help but smile as Jimmy Fallon rocks out in "Snowball" singing, "snot is drippin' from my nose." Also surprisingly, Little T and One Track Mike's beat poetic look at making a snow angel isn't that bad. But unfortunately these two don't redeem the entire CD.\nAbout half the songs never even mention Christmas except in their titles. Angela Via's "Christmas Wish" is about forbidden love (because that makes sense?). And P.O.D.'s "Rock The Party (RTP Remix)" features such lyrics as "Hey party people rock it all night long" and "because a party ain't a party when it gets shut down" to get you in the holiday spirit (not so much). \nWhatever original songs do attempt the topic of Christmas end up sounding like Old Navy commercials. "Better Do It Right" by Smash Mouth is about Santa's "bad kids" list and how if you're going to be on that list, you might as well be really, really bad. It might not have been so pathetic except that there are annoying people saying "hoo … hah" every two seconds in the background.\nThe only truly Christmas-y song on the CD is the last one, Trans-Siberian Orchestra's "Christmas Canon." But on an MTV album, it seems entirely out of place.\nSo if you're looking for something to put you in the holiday spirit, don't purchase this CD, instead go buy a candy cane or something.\nRating: 2