'Flakers' fleece the Finals?

Go ahead and hand out the trophy. If the Lakers haven't blown it by now, they aren't going to anytime soon. But stop right there when comparing this year's Lakers to Laker greats of old.\nWinning their fourth NBA championship in the "post-M.J. era" earns L.A. the right to be talked about as one of the toughest teams to beat. But in my mind, the collection of pro basketball's biggest divas is far from great as they manage to squeak lazily by instead of etching their way into NBA lore as one of the greatest squads ever.\nTo their credit, they've endured injuries, battling egos, court dates and media boycotts while finding a way to cruise on by in typical SoCal fashion. But what could have been an exciting season of watching a truly great team play (e.g. the 1995-96 Chicago Bulls), watching the Lakers has been a nauseating, season-long soap opera. And we already know how it ends.\nIn a science experiment where combining four highly volatile hall-of-famers has yielded several test tube explosions, the end result will be a boring first-prize win at the science fair that is the NBA playoffs. \nThe Lakers' success is not shocking, but the half-hearted manner in which they have achieved it is. Everyone is watching and waiting for the King Kong of egos to take over and turn L.A. into rubble instead of waiting for true greatness to emerge on the court. Instead of waiting to see Kobe hit the turn-around, game-winning jumper, people tune in to see if he makes it to the arena from Colorado on time.\nNot even the biggest of deterrents has kept Los Angeles from marching forward toward the title, leaving us to wonder if something truly special could have taken place if the team spent the same amount of energy on the court as it did complaining in front of the cameras at press conferences.\nBut the lack of excitement doesn't end there. Unfortunately, the headlining cast in this summer's biggest drama has proved dominant enough to get them into winning positions while the B-list celebs swoop in to save the day. Everyday ballers like Derek Fisher and Kareem Rush seem to be the ones the army of superstars are relying on to carry elusive championship rings to the hands of those so desperately seeking retirement. It should be the last great gasp of Malone, Payton and Jackson that leads us to watch the game, not flipping over to see who Jack Nicholson is with or what Vivica A. Fox is wearing.\nDespite all the turbulence, the Lakers have spent their 2004 season on a tour of the country, with their noses so far in the air you'd think the basket was 20 feet high.\nNot even overconfidence against Minnesota doomed the selfish and spoiled Lakers. There was Kobe's pouting when teammates complained of his wild shot selection, Payton's moaning at being the fourth corner of the triangle and Malone's injury, which he seemed to milk for all it was worth.\nIn what was expected to be the most destructive distraction, Bryant used his court case as a catalyst to lead him to some of the best performances of the season, proving that not even the U.S. judicial system can slow the Lakers enough to give Detroit a chance. How sad is it that the NBA's most acclaimed superstar needs a rape hearing to get psyched for the day's game? \nKobe's next court date, scheduled for June 21, is the day after the last possible NBA Finals game. Bad timing, I guess. If the Lakers need seven games to win the title, they really could use Kobe's good-luck pounding of the gavel.\nWhether or not you think the current Lakers are as dominant as the Lakers of old, ultimately this twisted blend of personalities will bring a championship back to Tinseltown. But the sports fan whose picture accompanies this article, along with most NBA fans (outside of L.A., that is) will be left bored and dissatisfied.\nWhile the 21st century version of the L. A. Lakers are a motley crew of great individual talents, their legacy will be created as they survive but not thrive -- a characteristic that has hardly one representative of one of the NBA's all-time great teams, even if they are composed of some of the NBA's all- time best personalities.