A jolly little secret

A few weeks ago I admitted to all of you in my column that I was a flip-flopper. Well, today I have another confession. Except this time, it is much more serious and has been a deep, dark secret I have kept for far too long. OK, enough stalling. Here it goes: I am Santa Claus.\nYes, that's right. I'm Pere Noel, Babbo Natale, Santa no ojisan, Jultomten, På Norsk, Kerstman, Ded Moroz, Shengden Laoren -- Jolly Old Saint Nick for all those of you who aren't getting it. I guess your parents were wrong when they told you that the fat man didn't exist. It was me kissing your mom underneath the mistletoe that night.\nI think people were always a little suspicious, though. After all, my physical characteristics were always a tell-tale sign. The jolly-ol' belly is always an instant giveaway.\nOK, maybe I am not Santa. Pretending to be him, however, does present a good excuse for my physique. After all, it's part of the job.\nBut even though I'm not Father Christmas, I do love the season. There is something about it that just gets to me. I love Christmas music, snow and big holiday dinners (which go straight to that jolly ol' belly I mentioned before). Really, I love the way people come together during the holidays. This season of happiness actually has caused me to do unusual things.\nIn fact, each of the past three years, I have worn a Santa hat everyday from Thanksgiving until Christmas. The hat even has an IU symbol sewn into it. I actually have the whole suit.\nLast year I wore it to one of my classes. As I was driving down 10th Street with my car windows rolled down blaring "Jingle Bell Rock" in full costume, most people looked at me like I was either crazy or an idiot. One girl actually flipped me off, although that could have been because she misunderstood the "Ho, Ho, Ho" I was yelling.\nSince I got the suit, I have vowed to wear it around campus during finals week to pass out candy canes. I have chickened out every year. And here's why: Santa can't do his job without elves, but I have none. For the past three years, I have tried to recruit friends and classmates to join me in this mission to no avail. I think it is because they are afraid of being embarrassed. Well, get over it because I need your help.\nSo, here's my pitch: I am looking for elfish-looking people to dress up in their own costumes and join me to pass out little candy canes and spread holiday cheer. Pretty simple, eh? Let me know if you want to be my little helper.\nBut even if people don't volunteer for the important job, I will still be out there making a fool out of myself. As this is my senior year and the last time I will have such a chance, I promise you will see me around sometime. \nBut I am not going to do it just to act like a jackass (although that is part of the motivation). The biggest reason why I plan to do this is to simply project happiness during the holiday season, which is something all of you can do whether you are one of my elves or not.\nDuring a time of the year right after a very decisive and dividing political season, it is important that everyone act with open minds and open hearts. Start right now by showing warmness in your thoughts and actions to offset the cold climate. \nAnd keep in mind, I'm making a list, and I'll be checking it twice.