A conversation about men

In an age when women are equal to men and men are embracing their femininity, stereotypes about dressing well still persist. Though both men and women were glued to the television to watch the final episodes of "Project Runway," men still battle stereotypes when people learn they are closet shopaholics. \nMy ex-neighbor Johnny is one such man -- fully equipped with more clothes than me and proud of it. He believes that what a man wears can have a major impact on his romantic liaisons as well his success off the field.\n"I think if a guy has game it starts with his wardrobe," Johnny said. "His wardrobe will show it." \nI don't know if all men feel this way, but one thing I have noticed is when a man is dressed to the nines, his attitude can often be worse than that of a catty, pretentious woman. I have believed that male models are 10 times worse than female models. \n"I think men who are focused, goal oriented and aspire to have a certain level of success dress well," Johnny said. "Whether it's the natural choice or if it is a choice forced on you by American culture or the media you ultimately have to be conscience of what you are wearing and what you look like." \nSo, if is this is true -- and I will admit Johnny isn't too far off the mark -- why do so many men think fashion isn't important? Many of the men I have asked said some do and won't admit it because of negative stereotypes surrounding men perceived as fashionable. So of course this is where relationships come in. I am not saying men date women strictly for the fashion advice, but every man has at least one woman they go to for advice on what to wear. Sam, a friend of Johnny's, said fashion is a marker in any relationship. \n"When girls and guys start dating, one of the biggest things in their relationship progression is that women need to change the guy's fashion," Sam said. "It's an interesting sort of power play; inevitably she likes him for who he is, then picks him up and then wants to change his fashion somehow. I think it's a desire to seem permanent or a part of his life that isn't going to change."\nWith that said I realized why so many men resist when a woman suggests a new shirt or new shoes. Fashion is such a powerful force! Not only does it signify class, but it also signifies where your relationship is going, and so does a lack of fashion.\n"Men care about clothes because women care about clothes," Johnny said. "It starts with clothes because it is the easiest thing to upgrade."\nIf fashion is that powerful of a force, more men should embrace it. Why aren't there more men at student fashion shows or more men in the fashion design program? Some of the best designers are men that have built empires making clothes for both men and women. Ralph Lauren started out making men's ties, and Miuccia Prada is praised for her menswear. \nI remember the last time I fell in love, what really got me open was that we had the same taste in clothes. We would look on the Web and through magazines at loafers, button downs and watches of classic preppy style. If Jay-Z, Oscar de La Hoya and Snoop Dog can embrace fashion then I think it's about time for men to follow suit. For guys who need help try GQ, Men's Journal, or my favorite, the New York Times Style magazine's men's fashion spring 2005 for pointers. You can even ask a guy who has great style. I know men want to look good -- who doesn't? There is power in looking good, a mystique that is unbelievable sexy -- like Pierce Brosnan in "The Thomas Crown Affair." \n"Men want to be an icon; they want to bring out something about them it is unique and individual, no one wants to be forgettable," Sam said. "Fashion can bring out these things about you that are permanent." \nSo when you are tucked away in your closet reading this column with a flash light and you find yourself wearing those stove pipe jeans with a members-only jacket, Cole Haan shoes and a Prada shirt and someone asks why, take after Snoop Dogg and say, "Cause it's pimpin'"