Mean girl politics

This isn’t going to shock you: I love Hillary Clinton. Always have, always will. Her name has a long-standing tradition of gracing my column. Today is no different. After my hiatus of editing-induced insanity, can you guess who I’ve been dying to defend? \nWhile I’ve recently been absent from the world of opinion columns, Hil has been the subject of some harsh scrutiny. It isn’t shocking that a presidential candidate would receive a few dirty jabs from time to time. And the mudslinging that goes on in the back rows of lecture halls — even in advanced political science classes — isn’t always as insightful as one would expect from students of their level. I’ve heard some very politically-savvy people deal some pretty low blows. However, I was recently surprised when I realized who those people sitting behind me and doing the most trash-talking about Hillary are: young, politically-inclined, mean-girl Democrats. \nDon’t get me wrong — I do often hear men criticize Hillary, but it’s a drastically different sort of criticism. They dislike her universal health care plan, or scrutinize her voting record as a senator, or criticize her stance on the war. But when women condemn Senator Clinton, it’s personal.\nSo why are her harshest critics those who would inevitably gain the most from a successful presidential administration run by an experienced woman? \nIt’s rooted in high school jealously. \nHere’s a common low-blow: “She should have left Bill.” This is the high-school equivalent of hating the girl who is dating the quarterback. Bill Clinton was the leader of the free world. He was charismatic and well-spoken and bound to, at some point, eye one of the cheerleaders. Still, they reconciled their differences and he’s supporting her. Get over it. \n“I just hate her.” (Some are easily translated.) She’s that girl who sets the curve in your favorite class, so you tell everyone you saw her cheating. She probably sat in the front row, obscenely prepared and asked questions that specifically showcased your own poor preparation. She probably brown-nosed every single teacher. She got into Wellesley while you went to community college. You should have done your homework.\nLet’s examine the unspoken objection to Hillary. It normally attaches itself in the unconscious eye rolling at the mention of her name. If Hillary wins the presidency in 2008, she also wins the title that has been coveted and hoped for by women across the political spectrum for decades: first woman president. You see, Hillary is not the first woman presidential candidate; she’s just the most experienced and most qualified. Women have been trying to score the title of commander in chief in vain since Victoria Woodhull ran in 1872.\nIf Hillary wins first, you can’t. If you’re an envious woman hopped up on political ambitions, a win for Hillary equals an automatic loss for the future campaign you’ve been secretly conjuring up. Translating this to high school terms means Hillary won class president because you missed the sign-up date. Better luck next time. \nI have heard one legitimate critique so far. She does look “tacky in red.”\nGood thing she leans towards blue.