VH1 comedian Christian Finnegan performs 2 shows at Funny Bone

With jokes ranging from nudists to Chihuahuas, comedian Christian Finnegan kept his audience laughing this past weekend at Bloomington’s new comedy club, The Funny Bone.

“You all made a wise entertainment choice. Congratulations,” Finnegan said as he began his stand-up routine at The Funny Bone. “I want this to be a night where we share something intimate and real, and then never speak of it again.”

Warren B. Hall opened the show, talking about small towns, partying and shaving his head because his hair is thinning in back.

“I could grow an afro, but it’d look like a cup holder,” he said.

Finnegan, currently best-known for his role on VH1’s “Best Week Ever,” kept the crowd laughing with his commentary on topics such as elementary school field days, foreign countries and his own metrosexuality.

“I know what I look like. ... I give off a slight ‘High School Musical’ vibe,” he said. “France is the only place where a guy like me can feel like a man’s man.”

In addition to assuring the audience they could trust him because he wore a sweater vest, he turned his attention to his Chihuahua, which he called an ear- and eyeball-caddy.

“There’s no valid reason for that animal to exist. It will make you doubt both evolution and intelligent design,” Finnegan said, hypothesizing that God was drunk when he made the tiny dogs. “‘I want that thing to look like a freak, and I want it to shiver in 80-degree weather.’”

Finnegan told the audience he wants the Olympics to be more dangerous, like adding a shark tank to the long jump and having competitors throw the javelins at each other.

“You could leave the pole vault the way it is, just take out the mat,” he said. “It sounds like something drunk frat guys would come up with.”

The 34-year-old also said he’s starting to feel his age.

“Last week, I hurt my back playing video games,” he said, segueing into gaming. “There’s Playstation and Xbox, which are like the Crips and the Bloods of the nerd world.”

He also mocked people who use Wii games.

“If I want to move around, I’ll leave the house, thank you,” Finnegan said.

While he said he believes every man is somewhat scared of his significant other, Finnegan argued he actually has a reason to fear his wife, as his father-in-law is currently in prison for the attempted murder of his third wife.

“Every once in a while, she likes to imply the apple didn’t fall far from the murder tree,” Finnegan said. “He’s not a murderer, he’s an attempted murderer, and I can relate to that because I’m also a bit of an underachiever.”

The comedian also took shots at mullets, a girl who apparently ruined his life in elementary school and unnatural photograph poses, such as giving bunny ears or a thumb’s-up.

“Are you trying to tell us you haven’t been kidnapped?” he asked.

Audience member Mike Drutis said he enjoyed the show, complimenting both Hall’s and Finnegan’s jokes.

“The best one is ‘How is this my fault?’” Drutis said, referring to what Finnegan called a travel game he and his wife play. “That was a classic; been there, done that.”

Next week, The Funny Bone will feature “Last Comic Standing” finalist Amy Schumer, said owner Jared Thompson, who said he thought Finnegan’s performances were amazing.

“It just gets funnier every time,” Thompson said.