He Says: Gentlemen, we’re stupid.

1920s journalist Henry Louis Mencken said, “Masculinity and stupidity are often indistinguishable.”

Ouch.

Fellas, before we get all hot and bothered, let’s take a look at why this statement might be true even today.

It’s not our gender that makes us stupid – it’s the lengths we go in order to prove and maintain our masculinity. It’s as if we’re always out to prove or get something for that very reason.

The truth is, most of us are insecure – yeah, more than you ladies. You want to get under our skin? Call us soft – or just say we’re gay. We’ll flip our lids. We might even put some of our faux-UFC moves we’ve agonized over to the test to prove we’re not punks.

We read Men’s Health and Men’s Fitness for advice on women and how to beef up our bodies to ultimately make us that much more manly. We’re expected to get the girl –  we chase them around like prey.

Don’t believe me, ladies? Head out to the bars and watch the guys. Better yet, wear a skirt and walk by a group of us. I bet we’ll catch whiplash just to catch a glimpse of your, ahem, backside.

Much of our self-confidence comes from the attention – or lack of attention – we get from women. We agonize over the myth of the pick-up and how to do it. We’ll bankroll women at the bars all night only to realize when the lights come on at the end of the night that she’s not going home with us.

There’s a void in our brains – a spot where we should know that getting women doesn’t need to define us as men.

But that’s not our only problem. If we indulge in any “questionable” activity, we begin to make fun of each other. We’re not supposed to be into fashion or own “Sex and the City” seasons on DVD. If our jeans fit, we’re seen as weird. Pink might as well be anthrax to some of us.

I experience the contrasting worlds of femininity and masculinity on a daily basis as a student fashion designer and football player. In the fashion world, my masculinity is seen as a rarity. Whereas in the football world, it seems I can’t be masculine enough.

I know not everything is easy for men today, either.

We’re expected to open doors for women, yet few women actually know it’s equally important for them to reach over and open our door for us once seated in the car.

We’re still paying for nearly every date, and half of us know we need that money for rent. On a past date, I actually offered to pay for the date even though those were the last measly dollars I had to my name at the time – all because I wanted her to “let me be a man.” What was I thinking?

Still, none of this condones our insecurity and, ultimately, our stupidity as men.

The late journalist Norman Mailer said, “Masculinity is not something given to you, but something you gain. And you gain it by winning small battles with honor.”

This means resisting the urge to prove our masculinity when it’s challenged by our peers, treating our women right at all times, being a gentleman in any environment, accepting others and, most importantly, being confident in ourselves.

If we do all these things, not only will we be more masculine, but people will think we’re smarter, too.

Bryan Payton is a senior majoring in general studies with a certificate in fashion design.