Writers Abroad: Don’t call the French rude

While working at a golf course snack bar this summer, I often struck up small talk with customers by telling them I was going to study abroad in Paris this fall.
One particular middle-aged golfer liked to voice his opinion.

“I hope the French are nice to you,” he said as he shook his head. “I don’t like ‘em.”

“Why not?” I said.

“I don’t know,” he said. “It’s their politics. I don’t know. I just don’t like ‘em.”

Others echoed similar beliefs throughout the summer — the French are jerks. With these conversations in mind, I arrived in the City of Lights prepared to deal with difficult personalities and constant frowns.

But after five days in France, the stereotype cemented in my mind has begun to chip away as Parisian after Parisian greets me with a “bonjour” and an eagerness to help. First, it was the taxi driver who quizzed me and my housemate on our French, then answered, in English, all of the random questions we had.

Next it was the lady on the street who helped us find our apartment building, even though she was on her way to her own destination.

And that was just the first day.

Now, I have yet to walk into a café or bakery without being greeted with a “bonjour,” and then an “au revoir” when I leave. It’s refreshing to interact with employees who stop what they’re doing and genuinely greet me. Sure, I’m just another American traveler ready to spend money in their establishment, but I never feel that way. Instead, their automatic customer service makes me smile, and I am cheery for the day.

But even with the happy greetings, I can see how some would agree with the grumpy golfer’s views.

First, the French don’t smile at strangers. The dean of my study abroad program actually told us not to smile, because it screams American.

They’re also often impatient with foreigners who try to speak French. As a French student since seventh grade, I often feel defeated when I ask, “Où sont les toilettes,” to receive the answer, “down the street, on the left.”

But on the first day of orientation, I learned what might come off as rude is merely a cultural difference.

Growing up, the French are taught that the world is bad, so be cautious. Hence, don’t smile or talk to strangers.

And as far as the English responses, Parisians are not rude — just efficient. Why draw out a conversation that can be finished in 10 seconds? If the French can save me more time for exploring Paris, I’ll take it.

I hope to see the same golfer again next summer so I can tell him about my findings and how wrong he was. He may not agree with the French government or the lack of smiles on the sidewalks, but I’m sure he would appreciate a friendly “bonjour!” every day.

I know I do.