Five thumbs down

“Johnny Cash and PBR, Jack Daniels, Nascar.”

You could be forgiven for thinking Matt Stone and Trey Parker sang those words as an updated version of the “Team America” song.

The unfortunate truth is that Ivan Moody screams them on “The Pride” from the new Five Finger Death Punch album “American Capitalist,” and he does it without the slightest hint of irony.

Five Finger Death Punch is a band that has spent the past few years shamelessly marketing its patriotism more than its music, so the newfound social criticism of the album title feels pretty empty.

If only manufactured rage were the worst offense here, “American Capitalist” might still come away with a shred of dignity. The absolute worst moment comes in the song “Remember Everything,” a sorry attempt at a power ballad that sounds more suited to Michael Bolton than a metal band. But if only Moody had Bolton’s voice, then his strained vocals might not have elevated this song from awful to truly unlistenable.

If my thoughts on this album still seem unclear, I’ll let Moody put it less subtly. “There’s a hundred fucking things I hate about you.”

That pretty much sums it up.