In a little more than a month, I’ll be leaving the country for half a year.
It’ll be the longest time I’ve ever been outside the U.S., and it will come with new challenges, friendships and knowledge. If I’m lucky, maybe I’ll even learn a thing or two about myself.
However, the thing that I am perhaps looking forward to the most is not what I’ll gain, but what I won’t have.
My phone.
Well, I won’t be entirely disconnected from the cellular world. The terms of my study abroad agreement dictate that I carry a standard cellular device with me at all times, in case of emergency. But it certainly won’t be the fancy iPhone that puts me within keystrokes of thousands of people at all times.
And thank heavens for that.
Advancing technology has transformed our world into one that is more interconnected than ever. While this may have vastly positive implications on global markets, far-flung families and the 24-hour news cycle, this college girl has been nothing but a victim deep in the clutches of smart phone stupidity as of late.
You see, in smart phone world, no one is truly ever out of reach, nor are you ever really able to disconnect from anyone.
In an impaired state of emotion, sleep deprivation or maybe even one too many imbibed beverages, you can start up a lively conversation with just about anyone.
If your little sister is texting you at an inopportune time? Why not shoot her a string of incomprehensible letter combinations to show her that you’ve been working hard to advance your scholarly pursuits while away at school.
Haven’t talked to your ex in awhile? What’s stopping your from catching up? There is no time like the present.
That creep you met at a party one time still won’t leave you alone? Responding to a text once couldn’t hurt or eliminate all chances of him ever leaving you alone again, now could it?
The point is that we all have moments in our lives where our judgment is clouded. If we’re lucky, only a few kind souls are around to witness the ridiculous things we do and say and can wait it out and laugh about it with us a couple weeks later.
But having a smart phone enables you to broadcast your stupidity with alarming efficacy. You could go out one night with high hopes and plans of a simple night of shenanigans shared amongst friends, only to wake up the next morning to find that not only have you called, texted and Facebook messaged every single person you never wanted to speak with in your regular state, you’ve also invited them all out for coffee.
And the worst part about all of this? You can’t take it back.
Even if you have the good sense to regret a message after sending it, once the send button is pressed it’s gone. Presto. Never to return.
I once asked an admittedly silly question to someone in the Department of Overseas Study, only to received a shockingly snarky email in response. Less than two minutes later, some sort of “official retraction” email appeared in my inbox, followed by a gentler, kinder version of the same message.
I’m not really sure what this individual was trying to accomplish, but the damage was done and I had no intention of communicating with said sassy administrator ever again.
Now you may be thinking the solution to all of this is quite simple. Why not just delete questionable folks from your phone contacts or Facebook friends? Or leave your phone elsewhere whenever you feel you may be slipping into one of these states of chatty carelessness?
Not all of us can be as adept as you are learning from our mistakes the second, third or 100th time around.
So instead, I will flee the country for South America, where my cheap cell phone will prevent these occurrences from ever happening again.
It really is the only way.
And if I’m lucky, maybe the Ecuadorians will agree to keep all of the dumb things I say in person between us.
— kabeasle@indiana.edu
