V.F.D. stood for “Very Fantastic Discovery” when Netflix announced Nov. 5 it will be producing an original television series based on “The Series of Unfortunate Events.”
Under his pseudonym Lemony Snicket, author Daniel Handler provided the sardonic comment, “I can’t believe it. After years of providing top-quality entertainment on demand, Netflix is risking its reputation and its success by associating itself with my dismaying and upsetting books.”
It would be an unequivocal understatement to say I am elated about this.
I count myself among those in our generation who grew a little bit more curious, snarky, morbid and indubitably verbose thanks to Lemony Snicket’s bestselling staples of children’s literature.
If any form of punctuation would best capture my reaction, it would be the interrobang: a hybrid of the exclamation point and question mark to simultaneously express shock and confusion.
I am most definitely in a flurry of excitement.
In the typical Lemony Snicket fashion, I am also left with infinite inquiries. Let’s cite the sites of my excitement.
Milling about the top of my list is that we can now pretend the 2004 film attempt did not happen.
Yes, there was a lot of star power among the cast, including some showboating from Jim Carey as the nefarious and oft-disguised Count Olaf.
Overall, it was exquisitely mediocre. This is partially because the narrative was a haphazard mishmash of the first three books in one film that couldn’t fully render Snicket’s highly stylized storytelling.
We’ve already seen television favor book adaptations with “Game of Thrones.” Episodic installments riddled with short- and long-term mysteries provide a form in which twists and turns may unfold.
And now some of my copious quandaries.
This will be a family show? These books are dark and bleak with multiple murders. Something similar had to be managed with the “Hunger Games” film adaptation, but there is a lot more dwelling on death in these books.
Lastly, I’m quivering to know who will play Count Olaf, but I am more curious to see who will collaborate with author Daniel Handler.
Perhaps I will tie a tightly rolled clipping of this column to the foot of a pigeon and train it to frequent the bird bath of a Netflix executive who may glance upon two suggestions I have.
If they want to keep things in-house, there is always Jenji Kohan of “Orange is the New Black.” She knows how to playfully handle mixed tone and even looks like she could be an eccentric character from Snicket’s story world.
Otherwise, Alan Ball of “Six Feet Under” and “American Beauty” may be up to the task. His dark comedy may be consistent with what Netflix and audiences want. With “True Blood” concluded, this could be his next project.
Whoever it is will probably be walking among us with a specific ankle tattoo.
Griffin Leeds
