IU was the only school to which I applied.
There were a lot of important factors for that decision. Application anxiety was doing quite a number on me — one tiny mistake could cost me my future!
IU was going to be the best value relative to any other school I considered attending. The school was the perfect distance from home. I’d have a great roommate from high school lined up. The campus is gorgeous year-round.
The above reasons alone suggested I might as well only apply to where I was bound to decide on, regardless of other options. But there was another huge consideration: the size matters.
I have an older sister who always had her life more together than me. Consequentially, I tended to follow her lead on things. She opted for one of the teeny liberal arts schools that litter Ohio like Romneys litter Utah.
Full disclosure: I’ve ?never been to Utah. I did not follow her on her small school journey.
There was this allure to IU because of its size. Between IU and Bloomington, there would always be something going on.
You can’t hate that.
I went to a high school on the medium to small side with about 300 students in my graduating class.
Before I moved to Zionsville, I had only attended private schools in which I knew the name of everyone in my year and most of the people in the adjacent grades. I came to Zionsville and felt daunted by that change at first but soon could identify just about all of my classmates.
This time, being surrounded by people I knew felt stifling. If I tried to shed any personal baggage, there’d always be someone to pick it up and hold it up to my face when I turned around.
IU meant a fresh slate through anonymity and more space to form my identity — cliché, college stuff. I also love a challenge. Why not be the Jesus to this Goliath? Sorry, it’s been a while since Sunday school.
One thing I do know is Jesus wins in the Bible, big time. Now I find myself in the last few weeks of my senior year. The campus is still physically expansive — ask any of my Purdue friends.
However, after getting involved in Residential Programs and Services, the Indiana Daily Student, the comedy community and more, after making friends and connections through classes and meeting new people practically every day of my almost eight semesters here, I can uncomfortably say this campus ?suddenly feels minuscule.
Do you remember learning about ribosomes in your high school bio class? They’re the Dippin’ Dots in your cells that make proteins. It’s that minuscule.
So now the anonymity I coveted is gone. There are obviously worse things in the world — jellyfish, for example, are horrifying. But as a closet introvert, walking around campus can be draining when people you know keep popping up like daisies in a meadow or jellyfish in the vast, unloving ocean.
This tells me is I’m ready to move on to the next phase of my life. I’m sure there’s plenty of graduates-to-be that can jive with this, too.
When I took my first tour of IU more than four years ago, I was told the story about the fish stolen from Showalter Fountain. With graduation looming, I wonder if the fish really just moved on to Chicago for the next bigger, better ?adventure.
gmleeds@indiana.edu
