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(11/14/06 4:53am)
INDIANAPOLIS -- Jim Irsay uses the decorations in his office to tell his team's story.\nThere's a signed photo of the three Manning quarterbacks, a plaque commemorating the record-setting combination of Peyton Manning and Marvin Harrison, autographed game balls and even a framed newspaper from the Colts' 1958 championship game.\nNow he needs another spot to illustrate the latest chapter in Indianapolis' growing legacy. Despite Sunday's unimpressive 17-16 victory over Buffalo, Irsay is now the proud owner of the NFL's first team with back-to-back 9-0 records.\n"It's amazing," Irsay told The Associated Press, "the types of performances and the wins we've had."\nWhat Irsay's Colts have accomplished in the past several years is nothing short of remarkable.\nManning won two MVPs and set the NFL record for most touchdown passes (49) in a season, while Harrison shattered the league mark for receptions in a season (143). The offense looks virtually unstoppable and the defense has been just good enough.\nThis year, Indianapolis is well on its way to a fourth straight AFC South title -- holding a four-game lead with seven to play over second-place Jacksonville -- and has a two-game lead in the chase for AFC home-field advantage.\nThe midseason buzz, which is again beginning in earnest around Indianapolis, is almost expected these days. Again, everyone wants to know whether these Colts could challenge the 1972 Miami Dolphins as the NFL's only team to complete a perfect season.\nAnd since November 2004, they've made a mockery of the league's desire for parity. The Colts have won 31 of 34 regular-season games, including an incredible 30-0 record when the games actually had some kind of playoff implication.\nIrsay has even used personal money to keep one of the league's smallest-market teams among the NFL's elite franchises -- and the free-spirited owner who likes playing guitar and now has a tattoo doesn't seem to mind.\n"I personally like to win, so I'll go into my own pocket sometimes to pay for it," he said. "It's been tough. Who knows how much better this team would be if we could have kept all those (free agents)?"\nThe Colts have undergone a major makeover since the 47-year-old owner took over the team in 1997.\nUnder Bob Irsay, Jim's father, the Colts were best known for losing games and players such as John Elway and Cornelius Bennett through the 1980s and most of the '90s.\nSince the younger Irsay took over, though, the Colts have produced seven winning seasons, five division titles and one appearance in the AFC championship game.\nIn 2005 and again this year, many have focused on the chase of perfection. To Irsay, unbeaten seasons aren't his desire. Super Bowls are.\n"People make a lot about the Colts in the playoffs, and that's not something we shy away from," he said. "We understand that. Really, the Pittsburgh game was our only misstep last year. But I think if you look back to 2003 and 2004, I think the Patriots were a better team than us. They were great champs."\nIn some ways, this year's success might be more telling.\nDenver lost in the 1996 playoffs after going 13-3, then settled for a wildcard spot in 1997 -- and won the Super Bowl. Pittsburgh followed the same script last year, after going 15-1 in 2004.\nDungy worried during the offseason that last year's nontitle hangover could linger, but the Colts haven't allowed it, continuing to find ways to win.\n"We've worked well, practiced well, we've not always played as well as we can," Dungy said. "But there's been no thought that we'll wait till the playoffs and work hard in January."\nIrsay isn't making any predictions about this season.\nWhile some look at the remaining schedule and try to predict where the Colts might slip, more than three decades around the league has taught Irsay one thing: You can't count on anything in the NFL.\nSunday's game against Buffalo reinforced that point.\n"I think what people do if you're an outstanding team is they kind of lie in wait for you," Irsay said. "They'll put a mark by your name. I remember we used to do that with the Niners in the late '80s and with other great teams."\nIrsay hopes his team joins that list in February. But until then, he's not making any plans for additional trophies in his office.\n"It's extremely gratifying that people are coming up with things that people never imagined, like saying this team is 29-0 or whatever when the games matter," he said. "I like to win, and I like to win all the time. But I'm not even thinking about January or early February. I'm just proud that we've been able to sustain our success"
(11/14/06 4:15am)
INDIANAPOLIS -- One of Indiana's largest war memorials will house a museum recounting the story of the USS Indianapolis, the cruiser sunk by Japanese torpedoes in shark-infested waters during the closing days of World War II.\nGov. Mitch Daniels announced during his Veterans Day address Saturday that the Indiana War Memorial in downtown Indianapolis would become home to a museum recounting the 13-year story of the USS Indianapolis, its crew, accomplishments and tragic end.\nHe said the exhibit is expected to be ready in late July 2007 as a part of the USS Indianapolis Survivors' biannual reunion.\n"We've long needed a home to tell the story of the USS Indianapolis. I'm glad the survivors still with us now know there's a place where generations will learn about this heroic event in our country's history," Daniels said.\nThe USS Indianapolis was sunk in shark-infested waters by two torpedoes a Japanese submarine fired in the Philippine Sea on July 30, 1945. By the time rescuers arrived four days later, only 317 of its crew of 1,196 men had survived, as many of them were eaten by sharks.\nThe ship's sinking and aftermath killed nearly 900 servicemen and was one of the country's worst naval disasters.\nAt the time of its sinking, the USS Indianapolis was headed from Guam to the Philippines after delivering to the Pacific island of Tinian the uranium-235 and other components of the atomic bomb later dropped on Hiroshima.\nMembers of the USS Indianapolis Survivors Organization have been searching for years for a location for a museum dedicated to the ship's story. Earlier this year, the group expressed interest in the building that once housed the Indiana State Museum.\n"They're thrilled to death about this," said Jeffrey Nance, vice president of the USS Indianapolis Museum's board of directors, a nonprofit that was formed to help the survivors find a permanent home for documents, artifacts and memorabilia from the ship and the crew.\nThe governor recently approved an agreement reached between the board with support from the survivors' organization and the state's Indiana War Memorials Commission to create the museum within the War Memorial.
(11/14/06 4:06am)
We have noticed a trend that needs to be addressed immediately. While we have a captive audience (both of our readers), we'd like to point out that we know from firsthand experience that students in the business school do have good qualities. In fact, both of us live with business majors, and we have been made aware of our misconceptions.\nOne of the knocks on business majors is that they take classes that are "unnecessary," "frivolous" or even "a complete waste of time." Clearly, those who make these assumptions have not checked their facts. For example, does Business and Economic Strategy in the Public Arena sound worthless? If this class is at all how it sounds (students wearing shirts labeled "Business Strategy" or "Economic Strategy" fight gladiator-style while the other students hurl food and garbage at them), our only concern is why we aren't all required to take it. Why take impractical courses on fabricated subjects like evolution or European history when we can take courses that will prepare us for future careers (like jousting with Nitro from American Gladiators)?\nAnother misconception about the business school is that its graduates don't have a well-rounded education. That is simply wrong. Exhibit A: Business majors are required not only to take Introduction to Managerial Accounting but also Introduction to Financial Accounting. All bases are covered! \nWe used to think that whenever our business major friends complained about the difficulty of their classes, they were exaggerating. False. Case in point: statistics. Sure, many other majors have to take a statistics course in order to graduate, but statistics for COAS majors entails basic arithmetic, unlike business statistics, which is composed of math too advanced to mention. Paradoxically, the statistics course required for business is offered through COAS. We hypothesize that this is simply to make those of us who aren't fortunate enough to be Kelley students feel better about our own mediocre diplomas. How great a feeling it is to wake up in the morning knowing we take classes in the same arena as Kelley School prodigies.\nWe used to get upset when our business-major friends would tell us how highly ranked the Kelley School is or how high their starting salaries will be. Then we realized they're right. They're actually better than us (especially SPEAns). \nWe feel the business school doesn't receive near the amount of respect it deserves. From battling to the death in classes to studying advanced mathematical topics, the Kelley School offers it all. In honor of our new realizations, we've prepared the following statement: Kiss My Kelley School.
(11/14/06 4:05am)
Since it usually takes me more than just one class to finish a crossword, if I finish it at all, I've come to think of the daily puzzle as my monochrome babysitter: She doesn't really care what I'm doing so long as I don't bother anyone with my pesky questions. \nAs I rack my brain for a seven-letter word meaning "cautious," the professor can go on ad nauseam. It's a sort of a symbiotic relationship that keeps the teacher out of my hair and me out of his. Without this arrangement, one or both of us would be forced to contribute to a discussion neither of us wants to have on the literary merits of some 13th-century shepherd's spiritual awakening. Fortunately, crosswords satisfy the same biological urge to block out the people around you that television does.\nIt makes me wonder if crossword designers feel as guilty as the parents interviewed in a CNN/Parenting.com article about how parents use the television as a nanny. The article, "The truth about moms and TV: Our love-hate relationship with the tube" follows a handful of parents considered to be part of the 85 percent of caretakers who "say they turn on the TV or pop in a DVD or video 'sometimes or often' to get tasks done around the house." \nNearly all of the parents said they felt some level of remorse for spending so little time with their smelly, dribbling offspring, and none of them were able to defend the television itself, or the channels being aired, as a respectable source of educational programming. But can we really harbor any ill will to these parents of ornery little brats? Why aren't we blaming the kids? They're the ones actually watching TV.\nIf you can walk, you can plow. Let's get these kids to work. A family of four could upgrade to digital cable with the hi-def package at literally no cost if parents put the kids who watch it in the fields and the factories. \nWe know that young viewers are especially susceptible to violent tendencies, insensitivity and obesity. We also know that children are a huge pain who no one would ever want to deal with. Since there's no eating the cake and having it too, a choice must be made: "Veggie Tales" or vegetable pickin'.\nSure, we can let our children be corrupted by the catchy advertising jingles of faceless multinational corporations, but nothing builds character like a tragic farming disaster involving a diesel tractor, a chicken coop and 500 metric tons of bovine waste. \nThe life of an adult is far more complex than any 4-year-old could ever comprehend. We need to start acclimating our children to the tough realities of life. Once children have matured enough to realize how little they want to do with family and friends, only then can we can reintroduce the boob tube -- or at least let them do crossword puzzles.
(11/14/06 4:05am)
I'm an imposter. Don't believe anything I say. \nYou're probably thinking I'm an evangelical Christian who's finally admitting his fascination with freaky male prostitutes -- but I'm not. I'll wait for a more socially crippling time to admit that doozie.\nNo, what has brought about this revelation can be found in the stars or, more precisely, astrology. \nRecently, I was told that I don't act like the Gemini my late May birthday and 10,000 newspapers' daily horoscopes say I should. \nThis all got me thinking about life, absolute truth, moral relativism and making hallucinogenic drugs out of my car's radiator fluid. You know, normal guy stuff. After losing my teeth and having psychedelic conversations with Jerry Garcia and Frank Zappa, I came to a fascinating conclusion: Astrology blows. \nHowever, this revelation won't stop me from making a cheap buck off your vulnerability and ignorance. (Hey, Wal-Mart does it all the time.) The following are real horoscopes that you can take to heart, along with some notable people who share your zodiac sign:\nAries (Kevin Federline): Today, just like every day before this, will be the worst day of your life.\nTaurus (Saddam Hussein): Take time to smell the roses, or at least the mushrooms growing between the cracks in your cell. You might as well just eat the mushrooms now and hope they're poisonous. \nGemini (Scott Leadingham): Don't forget to look behind you. It's like a pack of angry, disheveled and recently out of work elephants are charging right toward you.\nCancer (George W. Bush): Cheer up! If you lose your ball of string, you can always get another one to play with. \nLeo (Bill Clinton): Stay on the treadmill. You'll soon be returning to familiar territory and need to remain in good shape. Don't be afraid to splurge on a box of cigars upon your return.\nVirgo (Michael Jackson): Everyone knows you're weird -- why not admit it? \nLibra (Rutherford B. Hayes): Not a good day at all. Sometimes you feel like you're the most forgotten person in the world -- well, aside from Chester A. Arthur, that is.\nScorpio (Condoleezza Rice): You seek a position of greater power, but are you ready to be paid less than anyone who has ever held that post? \nSagittarius (John Kerry): Situations might require a healthy dose of your foot in your mouth. Try this mantra for a while: Don't screw it up for everyone else in '08!\nCapricorn (Rush Limbaugh): Back off a hard-line position for once. It might be high time to admit you've been living a lie for years.\nAquarius (Dick Cheney): You feel pressed by time. A once-friendly atmosphere is about to get a lot more tense. Things won't be so easy for a few years.\nPisces (Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg): While you feel surrounded by opposites, take comfort in the fact that you are the least feminine of everyone in the group. \nWhatever your sign, remember two things: Don't drink radiator fluid, and Frank Zappa's an asshole.
(11/14/06 4:05am)
There I was, at the races, trapped in a building where people were allowed to smoke indoors, and Starbucks was a foreign concept. In fact, there was no hot coffee at all. All I could get my hands on to feed my monstrous caffeine addiction was a cold cup of something that can only be described as dirty water with coffee grounds stirred in. \nAhh, the joy of returning to your roots.\nPeople ask me where I'm from, and often I say Cincinnati because I find that it's more representative of where I'm from than Kentucky. I am, in fact, from northern Kentucky, eight miles south of downtown Cincinnati and about two and a half hours due east of Bloomington. Still, I am Kentucky born and bred and almost never say it. Even when I do admit that Kentucky is my place of origin, it's always, "northern Kentucky, by Cincinnati," as if that dying city is better than the Bluegrass herself.\nBut moments like that, when I return home and find myself in gambling establishments surrounded by smokers and drunk middle-aged men with Southern accents who like to hit on blond twentysomethings like myself, I am reminded of the words of Ben Folds (And why not? He is the voice of middle-class white kids): "Try to put it all behind me, but my redneck past is nipping at my heels."\nThere, in the middle of Churchill Downs, I had to suppress the urge to cry out, "You don't understand! I write poetry! I go to the theatre! I spell theatre 't-h-e-a-t-r-e' for God's sake!" I want to sprint to the nearest Starbucks, bang on the doors until they let me in, throw myself prostrate on the ground at the feet of the barista and claim sanctuary. But there was no Starbucks. There was no sanctuary. There was no coffee -- and I was left grouchy, with a headache from caffeine withdrawal. The country music only exacerbated the problem, so I turned to my mother and asked, "Where are we? What happened to civilization?"\nI guess the most embarrassing part of all of this is that I secretly love the track. Horseracing is a pretty baller sport, and I can handicap the horses with the best of them. I've been going to the track my whole life. The truth is that these are my people.\nInstead of trying to reject my redneck past, I suppose I should embrace it. I will always be Jessie Leigh from Kentucky, who grew up at the horse track and saw Reba McEntire in concert at least three times. I've seen Brooks and Dunn, too. I've do-si-do'd with my dad at the father-daughter hoedown. I've been to a motor speedway race. I was in a commercial for a flea market. Maybe I'm the Osmond kids -- a little bit country, a little bit rock 'n' roll. I'm Cincinnati and Kentucky. I'm a Yankee and a Southerner. After all, Kentucky was a border state. Maybe I'm a border person. All that said, though, I still need my coffee. So, Churchill Downs, if you're reading this, get a Starbucks.
(11/14/06 3:55am)
During college, our capacity for scholarship, managing time and money and emotional growth is put to the test. When overwhelmed by these challenges, students often ask me if they have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. I hope to shed light on this important subject. \nPreviously called minimal brain dysfunction, ADHD is a developmental disorder characterized by poor attention and organization, excessive physical movement and impulsive, poor judgment causing serious consequences in most spheres of a person's life by age 7. As many as 8 percent of children are affected. The students tend to have frequent discipline problems and grades that are far below the average. Less than half of them will have residual attention problems in adulthood.\nHowever, when the problems do persist in adulthood, lives are often complicated by increased risk of motor vehicle accidents, sexually transmitted diseases and divorce because of their unreliable and impulsive behavior. Unemployment is more likely, and not surprisingly, adults with ADHD are overrepresented in jail and prison populations. \nFortunately, adult ADHD is treatable. Medication is the cornerstone of treatment, and stimulants like Ritalin and Adderall achieve significant improvement in about 60 percent of patients and are generally well-tolerated. While healthy patients taking approved doses are usually safe, there have been associated increases in heart rate and blood pressure, which can potentially result in an increased risk of heart attack, stroke and sudden death. Nonstimulants like Strattera and Wellbutrin have also been shown to be effective and can simultaneously treat depression. \nEfforts to acquire better organizational and study skills, coupled with counseling to improve interpersonal strengths and learn coping techniques for dealing with everyday problems, are important adjuncts to medicine. \nWhile drug companies work to create demand for ADHD products, only one in three adults who believe they have ADHD actually do. The majority have attention problems caused by other significant disorders like depression, anxiety and substance abuse. Others lack practical skills for learning. \nUnfortunately, several pitfalls exist on the road to proper diagnosis and treatment. Because of the nature of ADHD, many patients follow treatment recommendations inconsistently or abandon treatment completely. Conversely, there is a risk of abuse and dependence with stimulant agents, with consequences ranging from insomnia to vomiting to violent psychosis. To complicate the issue, prescription stimulants can enhance the mental focus of almost anyone, just like other chemicals from caffeine to cocaine. Many students are yielding to this temptation and risk not only adverse physical and mental consequences, but criminal prosecution as well. \nPossession of stimulants without a prescription is illegal, and selling them is a federal class B felony. Furthermore, people without ADHD who use stimulants condition themselves to function only under the influence of the drug instead of building skills that can last a lifetime. \nADHD and other conditions that impair attention are treatable, and the staff at the IU Health Center's Counseling and Psychological Services has the skills to help. Our mission is your success.
(11/14/06 3:50am)
We've all seen cartoons in which an impatient traveler dangles a carrot in front of his mule in hopes of spurring him onward. As intended, the mule is persistent with his march as long as the carrot is present. Eventually, the traveler ends up where he'd hoped, and the mule is, for the moment, satisfied with his reward. But what are the long-term results of this motivational technique?\nThe mule is being conditioned to seek short-term satisfaction at the cost of understanding the long-term implications. Commonplace examples of such conditioning can be found all over campus. I can't remember the last club meeting that didn't use pizza or class points to entice students to attend. \nEven during our lectures, professors use the carrot-and-stick system. It's Monday morning, and everyone in the lecture hall is thinking about the sleep they could be getting. So why did they drag themselves out of bed this morning? Oh yeah, attendance points. \nTo stimulate the discussion, the professor offers extra credit to the next person who asks or answers a question. Suddenly, amidst the stagnant pool of drooling sophomores, 12 ... 15 ... 20 hands shoot up, eager to respond.\nWell, great! Professors are able to engage us with minimal effort. Our understanding of the material will, in theory, be broadened, and everyone is content. Unfortunately, as a student, I know it doesn't work that way. I'm so fixated on the carrot that I've lost sight of the destination. I'm not asking and answering questions because I want to understand the material any more. At this point, I will say anything relatively pertinent just to get my hands on that bonus point.\nNow, I can't say that I have much experience with the interview process. However, last time I checked, Deloitte recruiters weren't handing out T-shirts and Smarties to their interviewees. \nThe point is this: The world has been ravished by this ever-present but never satisfied what's-in-it-for-me mentality. It is the driving force behind the corporate and political corruption that has exhausted our news broadcasts. \nSo let's consider exchanging our carrot and stick for a whip or at least a set of spurs. Rather than settling for students who expect immediate gratification from their professors, I challenge professors to expect performance out of students. Reward us when we least expect it, and we will begin to expect it less.
(11/14/06 3:49am)
CAMBRIDGE, Mass. -- He might be the most active philanthropist you've never heard of: a retired technology entrepreneur putting his stamp on science research centers at the world's top universities and sponsoring what he hopes will be 21st-century versions of the Nobel Prizes.\nWith his efficient use of a roughly $600 million fortune - big but hardly Bill Gates-ishly mind-boggling -- that 79-year-old philanthropist, Fred Kavli, could end up having an outsized impact on next-generation science.\nMany scientists lament that money for basic research is becoming harder to obtain, as governments, corporations and other big funders seek specific breakthroughs that can be applied relatively quickly. Kavli, however, is adamant about giving money for open-ended research whose ultimate fruits might not yet be in sight.\n"He's quite visionary," said Eric Kandel, Nobel-winning director of the Kavli Institute for Brain Science at Columbia University. "We need more people like him."\nJust a few years after seriously beginning his mission to stimulate advances in nanotechnology, neuroscience and astronomy, Kavli has launched 14 research centers in academia's most rarified halls, including Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Caltech and MIT, plus schools in Europe and China. While some are using Kavli's money to probe the nature of "dark matter" in the universe, others are exploring the minuscule brain structures active in human cognition.\nAlthough Kavli requires universities to match much of the $7.5 million he typically puts up for an institute, no school has turned him down. Many find money for basic research so rare that they send Kavli's foundation unsolicited appeals.\nKavli expects to eventually create 20 such centers. And beginning in 2008, $1 million Kavli Prizes in nanotech, neuroscience and astrophysics will be awarded every two years by the Academy of Sciences in Norway, where Kavli was born and first yearned to better grasp man's place in the universe.\n"I like to look far into the future," Kavli said in his slightly lilting Norwegian accent. "I think it's important for the benefit of all human beings."\nElements of Kavli's philanthropy have been seen before. He's not the first industrialist to disperse money to multiple academic centers. Arnold Beckman, an inventor who died in 2004 at age 104, spread at least $400 million to support research and education at several institutions.\nAnd while Kavli's $7.5 million to inaugurate an institute is nice, by some measures it's small. New academic buildings, for example, often cost tens of millions of dollars.\nWhat makes Kavli's model notable is that it resembles how a business builds a brand.\nBetween the Kavli institutes -- expected to be fed by an annual pool of $20 million after his death -- the Kavli Prizes and regular Kavli gatherings of Kavli-funded researchers, Kavli hopes to create something larger than the sum of its parts: a growing organism of avant-garde research.\n"Fred's interest really is more abstract than most, because he wants to fund the very best of science and doesn't care where it is," said David Baltimore, a Nobel-winning biologist who helped launch Caltech's Kavli Institute for Nanoscience when he was the school's president.\nThe Kavli Foundation's momentum is widely credited to its president, David Auston, a former Bell Laboratories engineer who later headed Case Western Reserve University. Auston's connections and credibility have opened doors for the foundation, which is based in Oxnard, Calif.\nThe foundation is getting most of Kavli's money - the divorced Kavli does not believe in leaving significant sums to his two children - and his businessman's emphasis on streamlining. Its operations essentially consist of just Kavli, Auston, a communications director and a fund manager.\n"One of the problems with philanthropy is to make it effective, and to use money so that it's not wasted away," Kavli said.\nThat principle is partly why the foundation expects universities to put up resources of their own to snare a Kavli Institute. Kavli and Auston believe the rule ensures a university is committed to supporting its researchers in the long term."\nKavli is confident this simple recipe will grease the wheels for breakthroughs that deepen our knowledge of the universe or help solve our most intractable problems, from medicine to energy. \n"I am," he said, "a fully fledged optimist"
(11/14/06 3:40am)
WASHINGTON -- President Bush, responding to concerns Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert brought to the White House, called on Monday for worldwide isolation of Iran until it "gives up its nuclear ambitions."\nThe risk to the world extends beyond Israel and the Middle East, Bush said in Oval Office remarks to reporters after meeting with Olmert for an hour. The United States and Israel say they believe Iran is working on nuclear weapons, although Tehran says its work on the technology is aimed only at producing energy.\n"Iran's nuclear ambitions are not in the world's interest," Bush said. "If Iran had nuclear weapons it would be terribly destabilizing."\nHis prescription for dealing with Iran was diplomatic, having the United Nations impose sanctions to force Iran to stop uranium enrichment. Diplomats at the U.N. have been bogged down for weeks trying to agree to a resolution that would place some sanctions on Iran for refusing to halt its enrichment.\n"If they continue to move forward with the program, there has to be a consequence," Bush said. "And a good place to start is working together to isolate the country. And my hope is, is that there are rational people inside the government that recognize isolation is not in their country's interest."\nBush said if the Iranians want to have a dialogue, "We have shown them a way forward," referring to the U.S.-European demand that Iran halt enrichment.\nOlmert said his government in principle was willing to negotiate with Syria. Syria's sponsorship of Hamas, the militant group that has attacked Israel and dominates the Palestinian government, and its activities in Lebanon prevent talking to Damascus right now, Olmert said.\nBush, also not ruling out U.S. talks with Syria, said Syria has to "get out of Lebanon."\nIn focusing on his concerns with Iran, Olmert offered assurances he was not looking for a confrontation with Iran.\n"I am not looking for wars," he declared in advance of his meeting with Bush.\n"This is not an issue of Israel only," Olmert said of Iran's nuclear efforts. "This is a moral issue of the whole world."\nThe meeting was the second Olmert had with Bush since the prime minister took over for the ailing Ariel Sharon. Palestinian gestures toward peacemaking with Israel were also a key topic on their agenda.\nTehran's goal is to "ultimately wipe Israel off the map," Olmert said on NBC's "Today" show. "The whole world has to join forces in order to stop it. This is a problem of every country. I know that President Bush is fully aware of that."\nOlmert also arrived with expectations that he could make small-scale moves on the Palestinian front, including the possibility of offering humanitarian aid to the Palestinian people.\nOn Sunday, the Palestinian foreign minister, Mahmoud Zahar, of the ruling Hamas group, accepted an Arab proposal for a peace conference with Israel, diplomats said. The endorsement marks the first time Hamas, which refuses to renounce violence against the Jewish state, has indicated it would consider making amends with Israel.\nThe White House reacted positively to what it called "some activity on the Hamas side."\n"Both sides are working on it, and we are encouraged," spokesman Tony Snow said.\nHe told reporters that when it comes to peacemaking, however, "nobody ever said it was simple, without bumps."\nOlmert had dinner Sunday evening with Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. There was no immediate comment from the Israeli government or the U.S. State Department on the meeting.\nIsrael is worried by Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's repeated calls to destroy Israel and does not believe Tehran's claims that its nuclear program is intended solely to produce energy. Israel accuses Iran of developing nuclear weapons, a charge Tehran denies.\nOlmert said in the NBC interview that he had no objection to the U.S. negotiating with Iran on the nuclear issue to achieve a peaceful compromise. "Every compromise that will stop Iran from acquiring nuclear capability which would be acceptable to President Bush will be acceptable to me. I'm not looking for wars. I'm not looking for confrontations. I'm looking for the outcome."\nWhile the U.S. has led international efforts to curb the Iranian nuclear program, Israelis are worried American policy might soften following the Democratic Party's victory in U.S. congressional elections last week.\nThe fear is that with American public opinion turning against the U.S. invasion of Iraq, Bush, a Republican, would be less likely to take decisive military or diplomatic action against Iran.
(11/14/06 3:37am)
WASHINGTON -- President Bush on Monday praised a bipartisan commission on Iraq for asking him good questions but said he is "not going to prejudge" the report the panel soon will issue. He pledged to search with victorious Democrats in Congress for a consensus on how best to proceed.\nBush said the goal in Iraq remains "a government that can sustain, govern and defend itself and serve as an ally in this war on terror." He also said he was "not sure what the report is going to say" but he looked forward to seeing it.\nBush talked in the Oval Office with members of the Iraq Study Group, headed by former Secretary of State James A. Baker III and former Democratic congressman Lee Hamilton.\n"I was impressed by the questions they asked. They want us to succeed in Iraq, just like I want us to succeed. So we had a really good discussion," Bush told reporters as he posed for pictures with visiting Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert in the Oval Office.\nSpeaking about congressional Democrats who will soon govern Congress, Bush said, "What's interesting is they're beginning to understand that with victory comes responsibility and I'm looking forward to working with the Democrats to achieve common objectives."\nIt was revealed that in addition to the work of the Baker commission, Gen. Pete Pace, chairman of the military Joint Chiefs of Staff, is leading a Pentagon inquiry into the situation in Iraq.\nBush's spokesman described the meeting as a "general conversation about the situation there," rather than a preview of what the group will recommend.\n"This was not proposal-shopping by the Iraq Study Group," White House press secretary Tony Snow told reporters.\nThe members asked questions of Bush, and he of them, Snow said, "but there was care taken not to sort of try to prejudge, or also to get a jump on what they are going to do."\nOn Monday, Sen. Carl Levin, the Democrat in line to become chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, accused the administration of ignoring the reality that "we're getting deeper and deeper into a hole" in Iraq.\nLevin, of Michigan, said the study group's report "is going to have an impact on whatever action might be possible in this Congress and in the next Congress."\nThe study group was spending the day at the White House speaking with members of Bush's national security team, including Vice President Dick Cheney, National Security Adviser Stephen Hadley, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, National Intelligence Director John Negroponte, CIA Director Michael Hayden, U.S. Ambassador to Iraq Zalmay Khalizad and Gen. George Casey, the top U.S. commander in Iraq.\nCheney, Hadley and Chief of Staff Josh Bolten took part in the meeting with Bush, which ran more than an hour.\nEven before it was finished, the study group's report was seen by many as having huge stakes. It could give the Democratic and Republican parties a chance at consensus -- or at least a tenable framework for agreement -- after an election that gave Democrats congressional control and reshaped Bush's final two years in office.\nMeanwhile, Gen. John Abizaid, head of the U.S. Central Command, met Monday with the Iraqi prime minister to "reaffirm President Bush's commitment" to success in Iraq, the government said.\nBaker has indicated the recommendations, to be issued before the end of the year, will fall somewhere between the troop withdrawal strategy that Republicans like to say Democrats favor and the stay the course policy until recently used by Bush and widely ridiculed by Democrats.\nOn Sunday, Bush's advisers adopted a new tone, days after a dissatisfied public handed the White House a divided government.\n"We clearly need a fresh approach," said Bolten, making the rounds of morning talk shows.\nLevin and Sen. Joe Biden of Delaware, the incoming chairman of the Foreign Relations Committee, predicted that many Republicans would support a resolution on a phased troop reduction now that the election is over.\nYet the Senate's top Democrat, Harry Reid of Nevada, did not seem to go as far. He said he thought the withdrawal of U.S. troops should begin within a few months, but when asked if he would insist on a specific date, he said, "Absolutely not."\nThe administration will not support a timetable for drawing down troops, Bolten said.
(11/13/06 2:50pm)
Whatever you think about outgoing Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld is wrong. That, at least, is the contrarian conclusion I reached after scanning the press coverage for the past few days. As some were frantically keen for The New York Times to decide what their views would be on this matter, I reached to my bookshelf and pulled down Pentagon analyst Eliot Cohen's essay on democratic leaders in wartime, "Supreme Command." \nThis is the single most important document for those various pundits who assure themselves and others that Rumsfeld's legacy of firm civilian management of the military is over.\nAt its core is the question: Who should run the show in times of war -- political or military leaders? This tension runs through American history, and Cohen settles it very much in the favor of the politicians. \nRumsfeld often seemed the bridge between military and civil relations. In the course of playing this role, he attracted an array of ill-informed critics from at least three diverse camps: antiwar Democrats who have been calling breezily for his resignation ever since he was offered it, only to be rebuffed by the president at whose pleasure he continued to serve; the military brass who largely despised his program of transformational warfare based on the assumption that modernization trumped manpower; and even (a few!) stern defenders of the Iraq war who ignored his many and varied accomplishments.\nMr. Rumsfeld built an accomplished record in his post as defense secretary. It's well-known that the United States is responsible for 48 percent of the planet's military spending. What is less recognized is that the Pentagon is responsible for nearly 80 percent of military research and development spending among the generally wealthy governments comprising the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development, which means that America's supremacy in military affairs grows every day. This was Rumsfeld's buildup, done in the midst of furnishing a workable war strategy after Sept. 11, 2001, allowing for such impressive regime change operations in Afghanistan and Iraq.\nBut while necessary, it was not sufficient. Despite my abhorrence for carping critics, it's nonetheless true that he conceived no way of salvaging a failing Iraq policy. War is a performance business, and in Iraq -- where the Army is too thinly stretched -- Rumsfeld hasn't performed his best.\nPart of the problem, of course, is that U.S. defense spending remains at modest levels, especially for a time of war. We have less to spend on guns because we're spending so much more than ever before on butter -- especially entitlements such as health care and pensions. A few weeks ago I wrote of the political history and moral legitimacy of the American Empire. Now, all evidence suggests we need an imperial army. \nPatriot though he is, Rumsfeld too often failed to grasp the need to consider, but also to inform, correct and even overrule counsel from the military brass. One hopes that his successor, Mr. Gates, will advise the president to fine-tune that long-standing imbalance. After all, wars are too important to be left to the generals.
(11/13/06 2:20pm)
LGBT editorial wrong on multiple counts
(11/13/06 5:36am)
KABUL, Afghanistan -- Insurgent activity in Afghanistan has risen fourfold this year, and militants now launch more than 600 attacks a month, a rising wave of violence that has resulted in 3,700 deaths in 2006, a bleak new report released Sunday found.\nIn the volatile border area near Pakistan, more than 20 Taliban militants -- and possibly as many as 60 -- were killed during several days of clashes, officials said Sunday.\nThe new report said insurgents were launching more than 600 attacks a month as of the end of September, up from 300 a month at the end of March this year. The violence has killed more than 3,700 people this year, it said.\nAfghanistan saw about 130 insurgent attacks a month last year, said the report by the Joint Coordination and Monitoring Board, a body of Afghan and international officials charged with overseeing the implementation of the Afghanistan Compact, a five-year reconstruction and development blueprint signed in February.\nThe violence "threatens to reverse some of the gains made in the recent past, with development activities being especially hard hit in several areas, resulting in partial or total withdrawal of international agencies in a number of the worst-affected provinces."\nThe report said that the rising drug trade in Afghanistan is fueling the insurgency in four volatile southern provinces. The slow pace of development is contributing to popular disaffection and ineffective implementation of the drug fight, it said.\nAfghanistan's poppy crop, which is used to make heroin, increased by 59 percent in Afghanistan this past year.\nInsurgents have launched a record number of roadside bombs and suicide attacks this year, and there have been clashes all year between insurgents and Afghan and NATO security forces, particularly in the southern and eastern provinces near the border with Pakistan.\nThe 3,700 deaths the report attributes to insurgent-related violence is comparable to the number of deaths -- about 3,500 -- tallied by The Associated Press this year based on reports from the U.S. military, NATO and Afghan officials.\nIn the east, Gen. Murad Ali, the deputy Afghan army commander for Paktika province, said 20 bodies were recovered from fighting in the Bermel district in the last several days. In addition, he said, two trucks carrying Taliban fighters were destroyed by airstrikes or artillery fire, and officials estimated 40 fighters were killed in those strikes.\nFour NATO soldiers and three Afghan soldiers were injured, he said, though a spokesman for NATO's International Security Assistance Force said he was not aware of any serious injuries among NATO troops.\nMaj. Luke Knittig said the operations in Bermel, which borders Pakistan, were part of an ongoing Afghan-NATO mission to root out Taliban militants before winter.\n"We know we've engaged in successful operations in Bermel with a purpose, and we think those have had a very positive effect against insurgent activity there," Knittig said.\nKnittig said Ali's estimate of 60 dead fighters "sounds about right to me," but he did not have an independent estimate of the number killed. "We are not into the numbers game here lately," he said.\nDeath tolls in remote areas of Afghanistan are almost impossible to verify and often vary widely.\nAbdul Baqi Nuristani, the provincial police chief, said only 25 militants have been killed in Bermel the last couple days. He said three Afghan and three NATO soldiers were injured in what he called "a very big battle."\nAli said tribal elders took the bodies of eight Pakistani fighters back over the border to be buried.\nAfghan officials have repeatedly accused Pakistan of not doing enough to prevent Pakistani or other foreign fighters from crossing the border to launch attacks. Pakistan says it does all it can, though border attacks have increased since a September agreement led the Pakistani military to pull out of its lawless tribal region.\nBermel is home to a military base that hosts both Afghan and U.S. soldiers. NATO-led troops aided by military aircraft killed 15 suspected insurgents in the district on Tuesday after troops on patrol came under attack.
(11/13/06 5:24am)
CINCINNATI -- LaDainian Tomlinson tied his career high with four touchdowns, and Philip Rivers threw a touchdown pass under pressure that completed the Chargers' furious rally Sunday for a 49-41 victory against the Cincinnati Bengals.\nFor Rivers, it was the type of comeback that defines a quarterback -- and a season. Then again, this one could be a turning point for both teams' seasons.\nSan Diego (7-2) scored 42 points in a second-half comeback that was characteristic of the old Air Coryell days. But instead of Dan Fouts, it was first-year starter running the show in his best performance yet.\nBengals receiver Chad Johnson set a club record with 260 yards and a pair of long touchdowns, and Carson Palmer had the first 400-yard passing game of his career. It didn't matter because Cincinnati (4-5) was helpless to stop the Chargers' two offensive stars in the second half.\nRivers was 24-of-36 for 337 yards and three touchdowns, leading the Chargers to their best point total in 20 years. He had a lot of help from Tomlinson, who ran for a pair of touchdowns during a pivotal 15-second span of the fourth quarter.\nIn the end, it came down to one nifty play by Rivers, who rolled left to avoid the rush and threw a 5-yard shovel pass to tight end Brandon Manumaleuna in the end zone just as he was getting leveled by two pass rushers with 2:29 to play.\nHow good was Rivers? San Diego scored touchdowns on seven of its last eight possessions, not counting a pair of run-out-the-clock moments.\nThe Bengals had one final chance to tie it with a touchdown and 2-point conversion, but Palmer threw to a covered Glenn Holt on fourth-and-10 from the Chargers 15-yard line with 44 seconds to go.\nFOXBOROUGH, Mass. -- Chad Pennington marched the New York Jets through the mist and tightened the AFC East race.\nRelying on short gains and long drives on a rainy day, the Jets ending the Patriots' streak of 57 games without consecutive losses.\nPennington also had a hand in the previous losing streak, when he led the Jets to a 30-17 win in December 2002 one week after the Patriots lost to Tennessee.\nAfter the Jets ended a seven-game losing streak to the Patriots, head coaches Eric Mangini and Bill Belichick exchanged another passing handshake -- slightly more substantial than the fleeting, loose-handed greeting the two shared after the first meeting that ended in a win by New England.\nPreseason favorites to win their fourth straight division title, the Patriots (6-3) lead the Jets (5-4) by just one game.\nPennington was 22-for-33 for 168 yards. Kevan Barlow gained 75 yards on 17 carries.\nPHILADELPHIA -- After plenty of tough breaks during a three-game losing streak, the Eagles finally got a big play and a lucky bounce.\nDonovan McNabb threw an 84-yard touchdown pass to Donte' Stallworth and Sheldon Brown returned an interception 70 yards for a score.\nThe Eagles (5-4) improved to 8-0 following a bye under coach Andy Reid while earning their first win since beating Dallas 38-24 on Oct. 8.\nPhiladelphia got a fortunate bounce to take a 17-0 lead in the second quarter. On third-and-15 from the Eagles 45, McNabb completed a 20-yard pass to Reggie Brown near the right sideline. Brown appeared to try to lateral the ball as he was being hit by Shawn Springs.\nThe ball popped straight into the arms of a streaking Correll Buckhalter, who scored the 37-yard touchdown.\nMcNabb completed 12 of 26 passes for 222 yards. Stallworth had six catches for 139 yards and Brian Westbrook ran for 113 yards.\nIt was a costly defeat for the Redskins (3-6), who lost Clinton Portis to a broken right hand in the first quarter.\nNASHVILLE, Tenn. -- Steve McNair showed the Titans what they gave up by not wanting to pay him. It was an expensive lesson.\nMcNair threw his third touchdown with 3:35 left and the Ravens, rallied from a 26-7 deficit for the win and their best start ever.\nThe Titans (2-7) had a last chance to send McNair back to Maryland a loser. But Trevor Pryce blocked a 43-yard field goal attempt by Rob Bironas with 33 seconds left, allowing McNair to celebrate on the field where he had won so many games before.\nBaltimore (7-2) needed McNair because a defense that came in as one of the NFL's stingiest overall and against the run gave up 162 yards rushing with Ray Lewis sidelined by a sore back.
(11/13/06 5:23am)
INDIANAPOLIS -- Just call him Patient Peyton.\nWith Buffalo content to slow down the Indianapolis Colts' up-tempo offense, a restrained Peyton Manning relied on short throws, an effective ground game and a time-consuming final drive to lead the Indianapolis Colts past Buffalo 17-16 on Sunday -- and into the NFL record book.\nIndianapolis is the first team ever to have consecutive 9-0 records.\n"They just stayed real deep and double-covered the outside receivers," Manning said. "When a team does that, taking away the deep patterns, you've got to be able to run the ball and you've got to be able to throw underneath and get yards after the catch. We were doing that."\nA few years ago, an impatient Manning might have been tempted to force balls deep. Not now.\nOn Sunday, he played with his customary accuracy — completing 27 of 39 passes for 236 yards with one touchdown -- and was determined to make the Bills pay for their tactics.\nBut the Colts still needed some help from Rian Lindell, who pushed a 41-yard field goal attempt wide right -- a play that would have given Buffalo the lead with 6:22 left.\nThe miss ruined a near perfectly executed game plan for the Bills (3-6).\n"We tried to reduce the time they had the ball and when they had the ball. We tried to bleed them for everything we could," coach Dick Jauron said. "We just didn't do it well enough."\nAs Manning looked like himself making reads and picking apart the Bills, his teammates adjusted.\nBuffalo forced Manning to throw more frequently to his tight ends and running backs. The dangerous receiving tandem of Marvin Harrison and Reggie Wayne combined for only six catches and 63 yards, while Dominic Rhodes and Joseph Addai had 27 total carries for 150 yards, and the little-known Ben Utecht caught seven passes for 66 yards.\nBuffalo quarterback J.P. Losman was even more patient.\nHe completed 8 of 12 passes for 83 yards, losing another completion on a scoring change after the game. Anthony Thomas, starting in place of the injured Willis McGahee, carried 28 times for 109 yards, and Terrence McGee scored the Bills' only touchdown on a 68-yard fumble return.\nIt wasn't quite enough to derail the Colts, who have now won 31 of their last 34 regular-season games.\n"I thought we would be a little sharper today, but what happened is they had a very good game plan," coach Tony Dungy said. "It wasn't anything we didn't anticipate. ... I wish we could have put it together a little better."\nThe Colts did get flustered.\nThey lost two fumbles, a rarity for a team that entered the game with the second-best turnover differential in the league (plus-10), and the second put Indianapolis on the brink of defeat.\nClinging to a 17-16 lead midway through the fourth quarter, Aaron Schobel stripped the ball from Rhodes near midfield and Nate Clements recovered at the Indianapolis 41.\nThe Bills quickly moved into position for Lindell, driving to the Colts 17 before allowing three-time Pro Bowler Dwight Freeney to race in from Losman's back side on third-and-5. The result: A 7-yard loss that forced Lindell to try a longer field goal. He missed.\n"He was crushed by it, and he's been so good all year, you're almost startled when he misses," Jauron said.\nManning responded by cleverly running out the clock.\nA 1-yard TD pass from Manning to Reggie Wayne early in the second quarter gave the Colts a 7-3 lead, and after Adam Vinatieri's field goal made it 10-3, Manning had his team in position to take control.\nBut Angelo Crowell forced Utecht to fumble after a 9-yard completion, and McGee scooped it up and outran the Colts for a touchdown to tie the score at 10 with 31 seconds left in the half.\nManning needed only nine plays to make up for the mistake, using a mix of runs and short passes on the first second-half drive. Addai finished it by scoring on a 5-yard run to make it 17-10.\nThe Bills stayed close, using McGee's 88-yard kickoff return to set up Lindell's second field goal and closed to 17-16 when Lindell hit a 43-yarder.\n"When we scored points, we executed; when we had turnovers, we didn't execute," Manning said. "So when you do that, it can be tough against a defense like that. When we had to move the ball and run the clock at the end there, we did a good job with it"
(11/13/06 5:17am)
Perhaps it was a cruel joke: On Saturday, the football gods forced IU to play No. 2 Michigan in the Hoosiers' final home game of the season. In the last decade, the Wolverines have played with the Hoosiers like a cat playing with a mouse. Before Saturday's game, Michigan had posted wins against IU in their previous 13 meetings. And perhaps it was only fitting that in the Hoosiers' final game at Memorial Stadium this season, it was Michigan that kept the Hoosiers from breaking their 13-year bowl game drought. \nThe Hoosiers were able to move up and down the field frequently, but as soon as they looked poised to score, the Wolverine with whiskers put its paw down and pounced, delaying the possibility of an IU bowl berth for another game. \nPerhaps it was only fitting that Saturday's gloomy weather spelled doom once more -- a 14th straight loss at the claws of the Wolverines. It was a fitting farewell for this senior class of football players. Season after season they have left every part of themselves on the football field. Season after season they have left it without an ounce of energy remaining and without a winning record. Bloomington has embraced these winless warriors as a city greets its defeated as they return from battle. Though home victories against Michigan State and nationally ranked Iowa have created happy hoopla, a bowl berth and victory -- winning the war -- has eluded these elder soldiers. The campaign began under IU coach Terry Hoeppner's mantra of "dispatch," a word with multiple definitions. It could mean the act of putting to death, or it could mean to send away with speed. So it was only fitting that the Wolverines dispatched of the Hoosiers -- with dispatch. \nOf course, the shame of the Wolverine whooping wasn't confined to our own backyard. The football gods continued their cruel joke as ABC and ESPN showed nationwide coverage of both Michigan and Ohio State games Saturday. The Hoosiers and the Northwestern Wildcats were both laughed at. Perhaps it was as an extension of ABC's hit show "Lost" -- a striking reflection of each team's mindset Saturday. (Then again, think of the alternatives -- "Desperate Football Programs," "Blowout's Anatomy," "Show Me the Funny" and "Ugly Setting.") Oddly, Michigan and Ohio State were playing a game against each other as well. It was titled "Who can outscore their opponent by more points?" The Buckeyes won, fittingly, by 13. \nFittingly for a game of cat and mouse, IU was mauled by Michigan. Now, one game on the season schedule remains, and with it hangs in the balance the number 13 -- only fitting for a football program that has endured bad years on top of worse luck. But more important is a question that will soon be answered at the conclusion of this final crusade in quarry land: Will the Hoosiers be bowl barren for a 13th year, or will they win next week and play a 13th game? \nFor more than a decade, the Hoosiers have cut their seasons short. One game remains before this team decides which 13th it will play for. A 13th straight year? Now that would be a fitting farewell for the Hoosiers.
(11/13/06 5:12am)
Both IU men's basketball exhibition games are in the books. Both were blowouts. Both featured a work-in-progress D.J. White and a surprisingly solid Armon Bassett, the backup/counterpart to Earl Calloway. Both displayed the sharp-shooting of junior college transfer Lance Stemler.\nBut what stood out above all else at this early-season juncture was the stifling, hard-nosed defense. \nJust ask University of Indianapolis coach Todd Sturgeon.\n"Their defensive pressure kind of wore us down. The fact is (IU) coach (Kelvin) Sampson's really got them defending hard," Sturgeon said during his media address following IU's 83-46 shellacking of the Greyhounds Friday night. "For crying out loud, they picked us up all over the floor the whole game." \nHe's right.\nWith IU up by more than 30 points during the second half Friday night, Calloway (who nursed a flu-induced, 102-degree fever most of last week, by the way) pressured the Greyhounds' point guard full-court on numerous occasions, as did Bassett when he took over defensive duties on Indianapolis' pointman.\nThat sort of defense is what IU basketball was known for under direction of former coach Bob Knight. The Hoosiers might not be the favorite to win the conference this year (Wisconsin) or have the most talent (Ohio State), but pressuring the opponent at every juncture is going to give IU a chance to succeed each year.\nThat's not to say the Mike Davis era didn't feature good defense. It just seems like early on under Sampson, the level of defensive play been raised a few notches -- perhaps back to Knight level.\nFor as much praise as Sampson gave his defense -- "There was a spurt in the second half defensively that I thought we were outstanding," Sampson said following the Indianapolis game -- he was also quick to point out its lapses.\n"I probably never am (happy with the defense)," Sampson said. "The toughest thing for a freshman to do is defend a screen. ... We had a chance at a five-count and Armon runs right into the middle of a screen. If Armon was in the forest, he'd run into the trees. That's a freshman. He'll get better at that as he goes."\nAs impressive as the Hoosier defense has been, the offense has struggled. It's been sloppy, out-of-synch and confused at points during the exhibition matches.\nBut that's OK.\nAs Sampson continues to stress, this is a group of men learning an entirely new offense under a new coach, and it's going to take some time for the Hoosiers to work as a unit.\n"When you've got a group like this and we're trying to figure things out, you're going to have some head-scratching possessions occasionally," Sampson said. \nThe Hoosiers start their regular season tonight against Lafayette College at Conseco Fieldhouse in Indianapolis. They will take on either Notre Dame or Butler on Tuesday. During both games, there are going to be some hiccups on offense. \nAgain, that's OK.\nBut in 15 days, the Hoosiers take on Duke University in Cameron Indoor Stadium. If the offense isn't figured out by then, IU could be in big, big trouble.
(11/13/06 3:48am)
Welcome to my panties. \nToday, they are light pink and boy-cut. They say "I heart to cuddle" on my booty. I love them and, oh boy, do I love to cuddle!\nVictoria's Secret splits its panties into nine sexy categories: bikinis, boyshorts, briefs, hiphuggers, low-rise, tangas, thongs, v-strings and no-show panties. That's a lot of panty.\nPanties are so important to Victoria's Secret that its sales associates are not even allowed to refer to the panties as "underwear." Next time you're bored, try to get them to say it. They won't do it. \nSo, one question arises: What kind are you wearing? And, also, what the hell are tangas? That's a question for another column, though.\nThe truth is, panties are crucial. They're like the secret ingredient in your special sauce. Say, for example, that your outfit is filet mignon. It's a juicy porterhouse of Dolce & Gabbana with a Manolo Blahnik sauce -- your spicy red thong is the perfect touch for a perfect plate. It makes you feel even zestier. And say, for example, that you're scarfing down leftover Aeropostale sweatpants with a side of Keds -- your spicy red thong will at least make you somewhat edible. \nYou might not look like a goddess, but you should start treating your vagina like one.\nPanties are unquestionably given far less attention than other attire. So why devote time and money to something most people never see? \nThere are two reasons. First, everything feels better in a great G-string. Put a little silk in your nether regions, and you'll be smiling all day. Second, you never know when you might have to show it off.\nYou could meet a charming stranger in the Dollar Spot aisle at Target. You could seduce the Jimmy John's guy when he delivers your "Vito." You could stand in front of Ballantine Hall wearing a sandwich board sign that reads "You're Not Too Ugly For Me." Regardless, opportunities are everywhere. You don't want to be missing out on the action just because you're sporting that "Dora the Explorer" underwear your aunt bought for you last Easter. \nI'm sure the ladies out there can relate. Say you're hooking up with a new guy, and he finally strips down to his skivvies, only to reveal a tattered pair of "ALF" boxers? Not so sexy. Of all sitcom puppets, ALF is statistically the least erotic.\nSo let's avoid those situations from now on. \n"How?" you ask. You've got to stay on your toes. Or, in this case, on your ass. If your undergarments don't make you feel hot, they certainly won't make anyone else feel frisky, either.\nThe good thing is that sexy underwear is not that hard to find. It's actually ugly underwear that requires effort. (Who's making that effort, I'm not sure.) Even the Pink collection from Victoria's Secret is sexy, and it's made for girls going through puberty. And most pairs feature multi-colored cartoon dogs.\nSo my advice is this: Always be prepared. Stock up on sexy things for your bod, and it'll thank you for it. Maybe it'll even snag you a stud.\nAnd, for the guys who are reading this and asking themselves why they're still reading -- try buying a lucky lady friend some G-string goodness. She might slap you, or she might let you spank her. The odds are bad, but it's probably worth it.
(11/13/06 3:47am)
Graduate student John R. Armstrong promised a wonderful theatrical experience, not a history lesson, to those who attended "The Crucible" Friday night. He was right. The familiar Arthur Miller play kept energy high and history lessons nonexistent in the IU Department of Theatre and Drama's opening performance of "The Crucible" at the Ruth N. Halls Theatre.\n"The Crucible" takes place in Salem, Mass., during the 17th century. A local girl has fallen ill after her father, Rev. Samuel Parris, played by freshman Taylor St. John, found her, his niece Abigail Williams, his slave and other local girls dancing in the woods. Immediately, talk of witchcraft erupts.\nAbigail, played by senior Jessica Rothert, immediately begins pointing fingers, so as to distract from the occult that took place the night they danced. She manipulates the rest of the girls into accusing town members of witchery to save their own names. Rothert does well as the cunning and manipulative Abigail; just watching her from the audience was intimidating.\nAbigail eventually accuses graduate student Lilia Vassileva's character, Elizabeth Proctor, whose husband had previously had an affair with Abigail. John Proctor, played by Armstrong in his thesis role, forces his servant Mary Warren, played by sophomore Justine Salata, to defend Elizabeth's innocence. Warren is caught between protecting her name and standing up for the truth. \nSalata gives the strongest female performance as the frail Warren. When she closes the first act in tears, it is difficult not to feel the pangs of her character's internal conflict. \nThe climactic courtroom scene of the second act introduces guest actor Dan Kremer, a member of the Actors' Equity Association, as Deputy-Governor Danforth, who is sent to oversee the witch trials. Kremer adds an interesting dynamic to the production, as he is a professional actor. However, the talent levels do not vary; the cast works seamlessly with him. \nArmstrong passionately executes his thesis role of Proctor as chaos and blame build in the courtroom. He carefully marks the transition Proctor makes as those around him give in to fear. By the end of the show, it is Armstrong's performance that truly stands out.\nThe most unique aspect of this production of "The Crucible" is the role of the witnesses. Watching from above the protruding slanted stage are 16 cast members, continually watching the events below. Clad only in black, their heads appear to be floating as their bodies disappear into the background. They serve as a constant reminder that too often people stand back helplessly as corruption occurs. The witnesses also sing beautifully and tastefully performed hymn-like songs at the end of scenes. The rest of the cast also sits on the sides witnessing -- literally omitting the backstage, which adds a more intimate feeling for the audience.\nPuritan simplicity is maintained even though the cast is not outfitted in traditional 17th-century clothing. Instead, the cast is dressed in neutrals, and the set is comprised entirely of plain wooden furniture. The versatility of the set and costumes serves to remind just how well "The Crucible" transcends decades and how relevant it can be now in the 21st century. \n"The Crucible" will be playing at 7:30 p.m. tonight through Saturday at the Ruth N. Halls Theatre. Tickets are $13 to $16 and can be purchased at the IU Auditorium Box Office or through Ticketmaster.com. Student rush tickets for $10 are available the day of each performance for those with a valid IU student ID. Visit www.indiana.edu/~thtr for more information.